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Alo ha the disadvantehw vl that luon dcm dai chua me m

Alo ha the disadvantehw vl that luon dcm dai chua me m AJPpx
Expanding tertiary education to attract more young people seems to be a positively promising direction. However, many people claim that this could neither be plausible nor make a significant development for their countries. In my perspective, I am completely against this statement, and the reasons will be mentioned below. To begin with, universalization of higher education may decline wealth inequality. Studying is one of the fundamental rights for all humans despite the difference in situation. They can attend any universities which are appropriate for their conditions though who they are, their financial conditions are contrasted. Thus, more and more youthful people would have opportunities to develop their capabilities and their knowledge, so they could get a good career with lucrative income after graduating. For example, in many countries, the government always has a range of laws and policies to stimulate or make chances for people who have many disadvantages to approach colleges and universities. Moreover, the economy of many developing countries can boost tremendously due to being provided with an abundant high-skilled labor force available per year. Thanks to graduating universities, employees have a number of specialized knowledge as well as skillful experience, they can make contributions to developing not only the economy but also the industry. This means their countries have more massive chances to make progress little by little in many fields which they have never achieved before ranging from manufacturing business to space science. In conclusion, I strongly disagree with that judgment, if young generations have more opportunities such as approaching tertiary education more easily, they can improve their abilities better and contribute to developing their countries.
Expanding tertiary education to attract more young
people
seems
to be a
positively
promising direction.
However
,
many
people
claim that this could neither be plausible nor
make
a significant development for their
countries
. In my perspective, I am completely against this statement, and the reasons will
be mentioned
below.

To
begin
with, universalization of higher education may decline wealth inequality. Studying is one of the fundamental rights for all humans despite the difference in situation. They can attend any universities which are appropriate for their conditions though who they are, their financial conditions
are contrasted
.
Thus
, more and more youthful
people
would have opportunities to develop their capabilities and their knowledge,
so
they could
get
a
good
career with lucrative income after graduating.
For example
, in
many
countries
, the
government
always has a range of laws and policies to stimulate or
make
chances for
people
who have
many
disadvantages to approach colleges and universities.

Moreover
, the economy of
many
developing
countries
can boost
tremendously
due to
being provided
with an abundant high-skilled labor force available per year. Thanks to graduating universities, employees have a number of specialized knowledge
as well
as skillful experience, they can
make
contributions to developing not
only
the economy
but
also
the industry. This means their
countries
have more massive chances to
make
progress
little
by
little
in
many
fields which they have never achieved
before
ranging from manufacturing business to space science.

In conclusion
, I
strongly
disagree with that judgment, if young generations have more opportunities such as approaching tertiary education more
easily
, they can
improve
their abilities better and contribute to developing their
countries
.
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IELTS essay Alo ha the disadvantehw vl that luon dcm dai chua me m

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
270 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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