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All societies have their own music and art In what way are music and art important for society and for the individual v.2

All societies have their own music and art In what way are music and art important for society and for the individual v. 2
Every region has its own kind of music and art, which has a great impact not only on society but also on a person. Arts and music are significant for everyone in many ways that we will now discuss. Firstly, music and art represent the culture of a particular society. In India, for instance, Garba is a form of dance and music, that represents the culture of Gujarat. One can understand the various aspects of a culture by learning its style of music and arts. Moreover, arts and music help an individual communicate with the people of different regions and to get the good exposure of cultures not only within the country, but also in other countries. Secondly, arts and music maintain the legacy of the country. For example, in India, there are diverse cultures and every culture is still preserved due to its own ancient folk songs and various historical architectures. So, it can be considered that arts and music also increase the tourism from all over the world. Even for an individual, it is important as a person remains connected to his ancestral roots with the help of folk music and arts. To sum up, one can say that arts and music are responsible for the longivity of the pristine culture and to conserve the history of the country. Also, music and arts relieve a person from stress and tiredness of day to day life. Therefore, arts not only impact the societies, but it is also an essential part for an individual.
Every region has its
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
kind of
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music
and
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art
, which has a great impact not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
on society
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
on a person.
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Arts
and
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music
are significant for everyone in
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many
ways that we will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
discuss.

Firstly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
art
represent the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
of a particular society. In India,
for instance
,
Possible spelling mistake found.
Garba
is a form of dance and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
, that represents the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
of Gujarat. One can understand the various aspects of a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
by learning its style of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
arts
.
Moreover
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
arts
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
an individual communicate with the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
regions and to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
exposure of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cultures
not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
within the country,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
in other countries.

Secondly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
arts
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
maintain the legacy of the country.
For example
, in India, there are diverse
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cultures
and every
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
is
still
preserved due to its
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
ancient folk songs and various historical architectures.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, it can
be considered
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
arts
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
also
increase the tourism from all over the world. Even for an individual, it is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
as a person remains connected to his ancestral roots with the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
of folk
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
and arts.

To sum up, one can say that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
arts
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
are responsible for the
Possible spelling mistake found.
longivity
of the pristine
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
and to conserve the history of the country.
Also
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
arts
relieve a person from
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
and tiredness of day to day life.
Therefore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
arts
not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
impact the societies,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it is
also
an essential part for an individual.
16Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
28Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes

IELTS essay All societies have their own music and art In what way are music and art important for society and for the individual v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
254 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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