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Agree and disagree essay about watching TV

Agree and disagree essay about watching TV 7adR3
In the modern life, every children's favourite activity is watching TV. Because they watch a number of interesting cartoon and funny programs. There is no doubt that a number of young people are spending more and more time watching TV or playing computer games. Firstly, young people using very contemporary technologies and they are playing in online. Nowadays, amount of children's trend game is PUBG and others. They are not reading books because their opinion that is activity is bored. Watching TV and playing computer games are modern and enthusiastic. Therefore, they are ignorant and lazy. But they hope will earn a lot of money. They have got a lot of dreams and plans in the future. Secondly, they are not spending time with family. The habit arise a lot of personal problems. And watching TV is very harmful for children health. For example, many young people's eyes are ill as, they are watching TV. Every people should an hour watching TV in the day. On the other hand, channels display educational programs such as the programs help learning foreign languages and they are many useful programs and they may learn useful skills. All parents should control children's daily schedule. To sum up, all children like watching cartoon and movies. If they are more time watching TV, it will damage their health and effect their behaviour. As a result, they will aggressive.
In the modern life, every children's
Possible spelling mistake. 'favourite' is British English.
favourite
activity is watching TV.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Because
they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
watch
a number of interesting cartoon and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
funny
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
programs
. There is no doubt that a number of young
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
are spending more and more time watching TV or playing computer games.
Firstly
, young
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
using
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
contemporary
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
technologies and
they are playing in online. Nowadays, amount of children's trend game is PUBG
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
and others
. They are not reading books
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
their opinion
that is
activity
is bored
. Watching TV and playing computer games are modern and enthusiastic.
Therefore
, they are ignorant and lazy.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
they hope will earn
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
money. They have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
dreams and plans in the future.
Secondly
, they are not spending time with family. The habit
Possible agreement error - use third-person verb forms for singular and mass nouns: "arises".
arise
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
personal problems. And watching TV is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
harmful for children health.
For example
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
young
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
's eyes are ill as, they are watching TV. Every
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
should an hour watching TV in the day.
On the other hand
, channels display educational
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
programs
such as the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
programs
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
learning foreign
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
languages and
they are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
useful
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
programs and
they may learn useful
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
. All parents should control children's daily schedule. To sum up, all children like watching cartoon and movies. If they are more time watching TV, it will damage their health and effect their
Possible spelling mistake. 'behaviour' is British English.
behaviour
.
As a result
, they
It seems that a verb or adverb has been misspelled or is missing here.
will aggressive
.

IELTS essay Agree and disagree essay about watching TV

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
232 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
4.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
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