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Advertisement has good and bad side. To what extent do you agree or disagree

Advertisement has good and bad side. PrGaJ
Having 20 years expertise in hospitality industry own holiday club is a burgeoning and prominent Indian brand. Founded in 2012 as Rigel Hospitality Services Private Limited, it is a one-stop solution for your whole event planning. We are focused on designing travel experiences, personalizing events and holidays to suit your needs. Own Holiday club has a clear-cut understanding about how customers plan for an entertaining trip for months, therefore, making their accommodations special in various hotels, resorts and clubs is our prior mission. We endeavor to deliver only the highest quality service to over local and overseas guests as well. Hi guys, Is this text okay? ?
Having 20 years expertise in hospitality industry
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
holiday club is a burgeoning and prominent Indian brand. Founded in 2012 as Rigel Hospitality Services Private Limited, it is a one-
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stop
solution for your whole
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
event
planning. We
are focused
on designing travel experiences, personalizing
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
events
and holidays to suit your needs.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Own
Holiday club has a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
-
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
cut
understanding about how customers plan for an entertaining trip for months,
therefore
, making their accommodations special in various hotels, resorts and clubs is our prior mission. We endeavor to deliver
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
the highest quality service to over local and overseas guests
as well
.

Hi guys, Is this text okay? ?
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IELTS essay Advertisement has good and bad side.

Essay
  American English
2 paragraphs
107 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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