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According to many people's opinion, using the death penalty as a deterrent to other people is the best way, while second group think other measures will be needed to criminals.

According to many people's opinion, using the death penalty as a deterrent to other people is the best way, while second group think other measures will be needed to criminals. mXeL1
Nowadays we cannot ignore that the number of serious crimes increasing each year. According to many people's opinion, using the death penalty as a deterrent to other people is the best way, while second group think other measures will be needed to criminals. The people who believe that the death penalty is the best way to deterrent other people. This group of people believe that if criminal who did serious crime will be sentenced to the death by government and killed in sight of people it will be the best caution to people. Then people think that if they do any serious crime they will killed by government like that. The death punishment will be taken by criminals' type of crime. Despite the good point of death penalty mentioned above still there majority of people who think that this activity is not good solution for crime. The death penalty is not good deterrent that criminals will loose their chance to be a good person. For example, one criminal stole something or suddenly killed someone and after this criminal want to be a good person by do not doing any crime but he/she verdicted to death and already lost chance. Therefore, it is not good penalty. Government should verdict with some measures by sending to prison with time. It would be better instead of the death. For instance, in 2008 government of Uzbekistan has changed the constitution and declined the death punishment for criminals but till 2008 government also killed criminals by their type of crime. To sum up, Although some people support main idea that death penalty but in my opinion there are other ways to punish criminals and also government should give another chance to live better. And i also believe that they should go another opportunity.
Nowadays we cannot
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ignore
that the number of serious
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crimes
increasing each year. According to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
's opinion, using the death
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
penalty
as a deterrent to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
If 'people' is plural here, don't use the third-person singular verb.
is
the best way, while second group
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
measures will
be needed
to criminals.

The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who believe that the death
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
penalty
is the best way to deterrent
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. This group of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
believe that if
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
criminal
who did serious
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
will
be sentenced
to the death by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
killed
in sight of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
it will be the best caution to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. Then
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that if they do any serious
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
they will
The verb 'will' requires the base form of the verb: "kill"
killed
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
like that. The death punishment will
be taken
by criminals' type of crime.

Despite the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
good
point of death
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
penalty
mentioned above
still
there
It seems that an article is missing.
majority of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that this activity is not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
good
solution for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
. The death
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
penalty
is not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
good
deterrent that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
criminals
will
Did you mean "lose" (= miss, waste, suffer the loss etc.)?
loose
their chance to be a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
good
person.
For example
, one
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
criminal
stole something or
suddenly
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
killed
someone and after this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
criminal
want to be a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
good
person by do not
After the auxiliary verb 'do', use the base form of a verb. Did you mean "do"?
doing
any
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
he/she
Possible spelling mistake found.
verdicted
to death and already lost chance.
Therefore
, it is not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
good
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
penalty
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Government
The word 'verdict' is a noun or an adjective. A verb is missing or misspelled, or maybe a comma is missing.
should verdict
with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
measures by sending to prison with time. It would be better
instead
of the death.
For instance
, in 2008
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
of Uzbekistan has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
the constitution and declined the death punishment for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
criminals
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
till 2008
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
also
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
killed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
criminals
by their type of crime.

To sum up, Although
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
support main
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
that death
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
penalty
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
in my opinion there are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
ways to punish
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
criminals
and
also
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
should give another chance to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
better. And
Is this the personal pronoun "I"? It is spelled uppercase.
i
also
believe that they should go another opportunity.
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IELTS essay According to many people's opinion, using the death penalty as a deterrent to other people is the best way, while second group think other measures will be needed to criminals.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
298 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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