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a trafic problem in the past you have had

a trafic problem in the past you have had 1bqoA
It happened in the summer about 2 years ago when I went to interview for a job that I was quite interested in, scheduled an interview at 2 pm, I was mentally prepared and ready for that day. I left home at 1: 30 pm to get there but an unfortunate thing happened to me. When I was about halfway, my motorbike suddenly stopped, I didn't know what to do. I think because it rained yesterday, I forgot to store the car, so some of the engines got wet and stopped working. At that time, I panicked and almost cried because I was worried that I would fail the job interview. I called out to passersby for help. Thankfully, a man saw and helped me push my motorbike into the repair shop. At that time, the motorbike mechanic said that my car had a damaged internal engine due to too much water. I left my motorbike there and took a taxi to interview. But I didn't show up on time and was 20 minutes late for my previous appointment. So I missed my chance sadly and disappointed. I feel that I should be careful, not subjective, prepare everything more carefully before doing something important.
It happened in the summer about 2 years ago when I went to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
interview
for a job that I was quite interested in, scheduled an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
interview
at 2 pm, I was mentally prepared and ready for that day. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
left
home at 1: 30 pm to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
there
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
an unfortunate thing happened to me. When I was about halfway, my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
motorbike
suddenly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stopped
, I didn't know what to do. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it rained yesterday, I forgot to store the car,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
If the text is a generality, 'of the' is not necessary. Did you mean "some"?
some of the
engines
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
wet and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stopped
working. At that time, I panicked and almost cried
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
I
was worried
that I would fail the job
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
interview
. I called out to passersby for
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
.
Thankfully
, a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
man
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
saw
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helped
me push my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
motorbike
into the repair shop. At that time, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
motorbike
mechanic said that my car had a damaged internal engine due to too much water. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
left
my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
motorbike
there and took a taxi to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
interview
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
I didn't
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
up on time and was 20 minutes late for my previous appointment.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
I missed my chance
sadly
and disappointed. I feel that I should be careful, not subjective, prepare everything more
carefully
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
doing something
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
.
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IELTS essay a trafic problem in the past you have had

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
204 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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