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a study plan for your children to college

a study plan for your children to college DonEa
- After graduating from high school, it is difficult to choose between getting a job or continuing their education. Even though there are some benefits of working straight after school, I believe that going to university is the better option. - However, you should plan carefully to have meaningful college years. Firstly, you consider choosing the right university for you. Some education experts believe that this is the most important phase because the university would have a big impact on your future. They also have some advice for the parents when bear choosing university in mind for children. That isn’t to follow the trend of applying to top universities, but the most important thing is to match the ability, interests and economic conditions of the family. Secondly, college costs should be prepared carefully. Parents can become financial supporters to help their children pay some fees for tuition, accomodation and transportation. Furthermore, you can set yourself a clear scheme consisting of school time, join the club or learn certificate majors. I would like you to look at this slide, here I have given a concrete plan for four years of college. In the first and second years of university, the amount of specialized knowledge isn't much, participation in extracurricular activities will help us have opportunities to gain experience and learn exclusive skills. With That knowledge you can make effective use of internships. -That is all I have to say about a study plan of the university. In general, the purpose of going to university is to train an intellectual generation to help society, just like Nelson Mandela put it: ‘ Education is the most powerful weapon you can see to change the word’
Consider using an m-dash in dialogues and enumerations.
-
After graduating from high school, it is difficult to choose between getting a job or continuing their education.
Even though
there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
benefits of working straight after school, I believe that going to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
is the better option.

Consider using an m-dash in dialogues and enumerations.
-
However
, you should plan
carefully
to have meaningful college years.
Firstly
, you consider choosing the right
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
for you.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
education experts believe that this is the most
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
phase
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
would have a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
impact on your future. They
also
have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
advice for the parents when bear choosing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
in mind for children. That isn’t to follow the trend of applying to top
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
universities
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
the most
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
thing is to match the ability, interests and economic conditions of the family.
Secondly
, college costs should
be prepared
carefully
. Parents can become financial supporters to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
their children pay
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
fees for tuition,
Possible spelling mistake found.
accomodation
and transportation.
Furthermore
, you can set yourself a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
scheme consisting of school time,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
join
the club or learn certificate majors. I would like you to look at this slide, here I have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
a concrete plan for four years of college. In the
first
and second years of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
, the amount of specialized knowledge isn't much, participation in extracurricular activities will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
us have opportunities to gain experience and learn exclusive
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
. With That knowledge you can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
effective
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of internships.

-
That is
all I
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
say about a study plan of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
.
In general
, the purpose of going to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
is to train an intellectual generation to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
society,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
like Nelson Mandela put it: ‘ Education is the most powerful weapon you can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
the word
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
’
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IELTS essay a study plan for your children to college

Essay
  American English
3 paragraphs
281 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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