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A number of pupil hold that opinion, charity groups should only help in native provincial, in contrast some believe that there are no limits to help needy people, no matter they are your neighbor or alien citizen

A number of pupil hold that opinion, charity groups should only help in native provincial, in contrast some believe that there are no limits to help needy people, no matter they are your neighbor or alien citizen m5EpL
A number of pupil hold that opinion, charity groups should only help in native provincial, in contrast some believe that there are no limits to help needy people, no matter they are your neighbor or alien citizen. Rather than forming my opinion, starts with discuss both the arguments. Firstly, lets begin with thought, where charity groups should advise to work only in native country. They strongly believe that if helps done in local places so transparency is high and less corruption chances. Moreover, the charitable organization well understand about the needy's need and its provide a perfect and ensatial things. In addition, that particular service which is provided in our country will help us indirectly, so its beneficial not only for needy person but also for community in indirect way. On the other side, by helping internationally the organization gets more fund, more volunteers and more opportunities for helping not only in different part of world but also locally. Humanity is the top priority, they believe. In my opinion, region like India, Pakistan, Nigeria, Which are under developed or developing, in this case organization should focus their homey firstly, by providing daily aid to needy, education as well as training for self employment, which ease some burden from government's shoulder as well. On the other side society like the USA, China, Japan, where poorest of the poor has all the necessary things, they should support overseas and makes life easier of different type of people by varieties of service such as providing doctors, teachers, volunteer workers and so on. In conclusion, I believe that neighbor and native of our country are on the top of priority and then organization must help in any part of this planet if needy want help.
A number of pupil hold that opinion, charity groups should
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
only
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
in native provincial,
in contrast
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
believe that there are no limits to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
needy
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
, no matter they are your neighbor or alien citizen.
Rather
than forming my opinion,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
starts
with discuss both the arguments.

Firstly
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lets
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
thought
, where charity groups should advise to work
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
only
in native country. They
strongly
believe that if
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
helps
done in local places
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
transparency is high and less corruption chances.
Moreover
, the charitable
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
organization
well understand about the needy's need and its provide a perfect and
Possible spelling mistake found.
ensatial
things.
In addition
, that particular service which
is provided
in our country will
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
us
indirectly
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
its beneficial not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
only
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
needy
person
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
for community in indirect way.

On the other side, by helping
internationally
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
organization
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
gets
more fund, more volunteers and more opportunities for helping not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
only
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
part of world
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
locally
. Humanity is the top priority, they believe.

In my opinion, region like India, Pakistan, Nigeria, Which are under developed or developing,
in this case
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
organization
should focus their homey
firstly
, by providing daily aid to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
needy
, education
as well
as training for self employment, which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ease
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
burden from
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
's shoulder
as well
. On the other side society like the USA, China, Japan, where poorest of the poor has all the necessary things, they should support overseas and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
life easier of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
type of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
by varieties of service such as providing doctors, teachers, volunteer workers and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
on.

In conclusion
, I believe that neighbor and native of our country are on the top of priority and then
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
organization
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
in any part of this planet if
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
needy
want
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
.
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IELTS essay A number of pupil hold that opinion, charity groups should only help in native provincial, in contrast some believe that there are no limits to help needy people, no matter they are your neighbor or alien citizen

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
291 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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