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A healthy person is often described as someone who has a good diet, gets plenty of exercises and avoids stress. what should people do to stay healthy in your country? give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. v.1

A healthy person is often described as someone who has a good diet, gets plenty of exercises and avoids stress. what should people do to stay healthy in your country? v. 1
As well all know ” health is the biggest assets” which one can have. Nowadays, due to modernization people adopt an unhealthy lifestyle instead of being healthy. It is true that a person who lives there life stressfree and does a lot of exercises remain always fit and healthy. I will elaborate in the following paragraph what are these steps which help people to live healthily. First of all, the main step for good health is to eat a balanced diet. In other words, individuals include fruits, green vegetables and pulses in their daily food plan because these are a rich source of vitamins and nutrition which protect human being to be overweight. Apart from that, people should drink at least 8to10 glasses of water in a day. As a result of it, extra toxins can be removed from our body through urine and it stays a person young and fit lifelong. Furthermore, humans should perform some physical activities in their daily routine to live physical well because in today’s time everyone depends on machines to do their work. Because of it, the immune system of our body does not work properly and it makes people unhealthy. So that if mankind wants to be fit and live longer then they should do exercises such as running, yoga, meditation and so on. To conclude, people who want to switch unhealthy to a healthy lifestyle. They should do some changes in their eating habits, be happy always and do exercise daily. As it is well said that ” Health is wealth” so everyone should take care of it.
“As” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
As
well all know
Don't put a space on both sides of a quote symbol
”
health is the biggest assets” which one can have. Nowadays, due to modernization
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
adopt an unhealthy lifestyle
instead
of being healthy. It is true that a person who
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lives
there life
Possible spelling mistake found.
stressfree
and does
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
exercises remain always fit and healthy. I will elaborate in the following paragraph what are these steps which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
live
healthily
.

This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
, the main step for
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
health is to eat a balanced diet.
In other words
, individuals include fruits, green vegetables and pulses in their daily food plan
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
these are a rich source of vitamins and nutrition which protect human being to be overweight. Apart from that,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
should drink at least 8to10 glasses of water in a day.
As a result
of it, extra toxins can
be removed
from our body through urine and it stays a person young and fit lifelong.

Furthermore
, humans should perform
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
physical activities in their daily routine to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
live
physical well
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
’s time everyone depends on machines to do their work.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Because
of it, the immune system of our body does not work
properly
and it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
unhealthy.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
that if mankind wants to
be fit
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
live
longer then they should do exercises such as running, yoga, meditation and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
on.

To conclude
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who want to switch unhealthy to a healthy lifestyle. They should do
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
in their eating habits, be happy always and do exercise daily. As it is well said that
Don't put a space on both sides of a quote symbol
”
Health is wealth”
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
everyone should take care of it.
11Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
9Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5Mistakes

IELTS essay A healthy person is often described as someone who has a good diet, gets plenty of exercises and avoids stress. what should people do to stay healthy in your country? v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
266 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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