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A cultural shock and different cultures

A cultural shock and different cultures Kyj2w
To begin with, the definition of culture is a unique identity of each specific area. It defines the way of life of people in every corner of the world; food, dressing, greetings, etc. By this, a cultural shock could happen when people tend to move and travel to different places. It is difficult to deny that unfamiliar cultures can lead people to experience uncomfortable and weird circumstances. For instance, the way of eating between Canada and Thailand is completely different from each other; Canadians are not having rice in their meals, they usually have bread or mashed potatoes instead. Simultaneously, Thai people always serve rice as a main dish for all of their meals; breakfast, lunch, and dinner. Therefore, Thai people are undeniable to experience the culture shock in terms of cuisine when they are in Canada. Accordingly, this state of cultural shock leads people to learn and adapt themselves to the new traditions in order to develop their intercultural competence. To admit, intercultural competence helps people become more comfortable to live and get along with new environments.
To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, the definition of culture is a unique identity of each specific area. It defines the way of life of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in every corner of the world; food, dressing, greetings, etc. By this, a cultural shock could happen when
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
tend to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
move
and travel to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
places. It is difficult to deny that unfamiliar cultures can lead
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to experience uncomfortable and weird circumstances.
For instance
, the way of eating between Canada and Thailand is completely
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
from each other; Canadians are not having rice in their meals, they
usually
have bread or mashed potatoes
instead
.
Simultaneously
, Thai
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
always serve rice as a main dish for all of their meals; breakfast, lunch, and dinner.
Therefore
, Thai
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are undeniable to experience the culture shock in terms of cuisine when they are in Canada.
Accordingly
, this state of cultural shock leads
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to learn and adapt themselves to the new traditions in order to develop their intercultural competence. To admit, intercultural competence
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
become more comfortable to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
along with new environments.
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IELTS essay A cultural shock and different cultures

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
178 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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