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A company has announced that it wishes to build a new factory near your community. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of this influence on your community. Do you support or oppose the factory? Explain your position. v.1

A company has announced that it wishes to build a new factory near your community. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of this influence on your community. Do you support or oppose the factory? Explain your position. v. 1
People have different opinion regarding exploring animals for experiments. While some people feel it as brutal others believe it is mandatory for advancement of science. This essay intended to discuss both these views and in my opinion, it is an inevitable thing for the development of medical sciences. On the one hand, some people are animal lovers and they argue that all living creatures have equal rights to live in the earth. A huge number of animals: mice, dogs, apes and frogs are used for various experiments. In other words, for the studying pumping activity of heart live frogs are being used as specimens; while making incisions in the body the animal experience a lot of pain and they may loss their life. A study, for instance, conducted by the Queen's university found that around 700 million animals are being hurt or killed during a year for human's research purposes. On the other hand, the main reason why people think using animals for experiments is needed is scientists cannot do experience in other human beings. This is because some drugs may cause serious life threatening side effects on people's body. If scientists can do research on an animal, those poses almost similar physical structure of human beings like monkeys and apes, they can monitor the effectiveness of the drug before introducing it to people. As a consequence, the detrimental effects of those drugs could be ameliorated before making its final product. For example, an article published in the WHO official website stated scientists from The US used monkeys for making retroviral drugs for the treatment of dreadful disease HIV AIDS in 2008. In conclusion, although some people believe that it is cruel to use animals for research studies, I think it is essential for the development of science, especially medical field, to utilize animals as samples for studies.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
opinion regarding exploring
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
for experiments. While
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
feel it as brutal others believe it is mandatory for advancement of science. This essay intended to discuss both these views and in my opinion, it is an inevitable thing for the development of medical sciences.

On the one hand,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animal
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
lovers and
they argue that all living creatures have equal rights to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in the earth. A huge number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
: mice, dogs, apes and frogs are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
for various experiments. In
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
words, for the studying pumping activity of heart
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
frogs are being
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
as specimens; while making incisions in the body the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animal
experience
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
pain and
they may
"loss" is a noun. Did you mean the verb "lose" (= 'to lose')?
loss
their life. A study,
for instance
, conducted by the Queen's university found that around 700 million
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
are
being hurt
or killed during a year for human's research purposes.

On the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
hand, the main reason why
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
using
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
for experiments
is needed
is scientists cannot do experience in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
human beings. This is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drugs
may cause serious life threatening side effects on
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
's body. If scientists can do research on an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animal
, those poses almost similar physical structure of human beings like monkeys and apes, they can monitor the effectiveness of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drug
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
introducing it to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. As a consequence, the detrimental effects of those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drugs
could
be ameliorated
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
making its final product.
For example
, an article published in the WHO official website stated scientists from The US
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
monkeys for making
Possible spelling mistake found.
retroviral
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drugs
for the treatment of dreadful disease HIV AIDS in 2008.

In conclusion
, although
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
believe that it is cruel to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
for research studies, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
it is essential for the development of science,
especially
medical field, to utilize
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
as samples for studies.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes

IELTS essay A company has announced that it wishes to build a new factory near your community. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of this influence on your community. Do you support or oppose the factory? Explain your position. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
308 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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