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787 describe a place you have recently visitedyou should saywhere you wentwho you went withhow you got thereand explain why you enjoyed it v.1

787 describe a place you have recently visitedyou should saywhere you wentwho you went withhow you got thereand explain why you enjoyed it v. 1
Marriage is an event used to legalize the relation into a husband and a wife, so some people believe in showcasing this occasion by spending a large amount of money on it, while other contradicts it. In my view, money should be spent cautiously on the celebration of the marriage ceremony. On the one hand, marriage is considered a very special day for the couple and their respective families, so most of the people want to make it memorable through different ways. To illustrate, these days, destination weddings are trending at exotic locations with expensive decorations, variety of cuisines on the food menu list, branded wedding dresses, and luxurious gifts. Secondly, these occasions, keep the society linked to their traditional beliefs and customs, which are being practiced while conducting the marriage ceremonies and thus, preserving the cultural heritage and maintaining the importance of relationships. Apart from it, the big fat weddings are considered as a status symbol by showcasing their financial power and the high profile guest list. On the other hand, the financial amount used for the wedding day can be utilized in a more productive ways. For example, it can be used to pay off any student debt of those who gets married immediately after passing out of their colleges, to make investments in their businesses, to buy a house rather than paying rent, to establish contacts and sharing ideas by travelling, and for the education of their future kids. Moreover, it is creating an unnecessary competition among the families and neighbours to give a lavish wedding party by borrowing the loans from the banks and staying with the debt later on in life. To recapitulate, I opine that regardless of momentary happiness provided by lavish ceremonies, marriages should be celebrated in the small ceremonies with limited gatherings, and saving the money for all the future endeavours of the newly formed couple.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Marriage
is an
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
event
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to legalize the relation into a husband and a wife,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
believe in showcasing this occasion by spending a large amount of money on it, while other contradicts it. In my view, money should
be spent
cautiously
on the celebration of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
marriage
ceremony.

On the one hand,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
marriage
is considered
a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
special day for the couple and their respective families,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
most of the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
want to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
it memorable through
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
ways. To illustrate, these days, destination
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
weddings
are trending at exotic locations with expensive decorations, variety of cuisines on the food menu list, branded
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
wedding
dresses, and luxurious gifts.
Secondly
, these occasions,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
the society linked to their traditional beliefs and customs, which are
being practiced
while conducting the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
marriage
ceremonies and
thus
, preserving the cultural heritage and maintaining the importance of relationships. Apart from it, the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
fat
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
weddings
are considered
as a status symbol by showcasing their financial power and the high profile guest list.

On the other hand
, the financial amount
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
wedding
day can
be utilized
in a more productive ways.
For example
, it can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to pay off any student debt of those who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
gets
married immediately after passing out of their colleges, to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
investments in their businesses, to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
rather
than paying rent, to establish contacts and sharing
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ideas
by travelling, and for the education of their future kids.
Moreover
, it is creating an unnecessary competition among the families and
Possible spelling mistake. 'neighbours' is British English.
neighbours
to give a lavish
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
wedding
party by borrowing the loans from the banks and staying with the debt later on in life.

To recapitulate, I opine that regardless of momentary happiness provided by lavish ceremonies,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
marriages
should
be celebrated
in the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
ceremonies with limited gatherings, and saving the money for all the future
Possible spelling mistake. 'endeavours' is British English.
endeavours
of the
newly
formed couple.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay 787 describe a place you have recently visitedyou should saywhere you wentwho you went withhow you got thereand explain why you enjoyed it v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
314 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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