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Tourism is becoming increasingly important as a source of revenue to many countries, but its disadvantages should not be overlooked. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

4. Tourism is becoming increasingly important as a source of revenue to many countries, but its disadvantages should not be overlooked. v. 1
With the development in technology, traveling worldwide has become much easier than in previous decades; hence tourism significantly contributes to the country's revenue. As you may guess, the more tourism becomes crucial for states, the more downsides that they may face arises. I strongly believe that tourism adversely affects numerous countries in many ways, although it brings money. Based on the traditional culture of societies and environmental pollution, this essay sides with the idea that tourism's disadvantages cannot be ignored. First and foremost, every civilization has its unique characteristic; thereby, travelers from different parts of the world visit countries with their own cultural truths and beliefs, severely threatening conventional culture. Tourists may seriously offend locals even if they do not intend to do this. In the end, overload alternation in traditional lifestyle may ruin countries' historical context. However, even worse, foreign visitors may bother natives with their normal behaviors in their states. This endangers the travelers' safety and eventually increases the crime rate. Consequently, a country's reputation increasingly degrades. Furthermore, every human can be considered as a potential polluter of the environment; thus, the rising of tourists' numbers increases environmental contamination exponentially. Visitors may throw away various materials that cannot dissolve in nature, such as plastic bags, bottles, cups, etc. Moreover, renting private cars or hailing taxis for going somewhere would boost air pollution. The growing rate of carbon dioxide in the atmosphere would trigger climate change. If we do not halt this situation, there would be nowhere worth visiting, even live. To sum up, tourism has ups and downs like every life case, nevertheless, disregarding its disadvantages would finally damage states' culture and atmosphere. Income coming from tourism charms authorities, yet they should take its cons into consideration immediately. Protecting culture and environment from tourism' disadvantages should be two profound emphases when the government is looking for a solution.
With the development in technology, traveling worldwide has become much easier than in previous decades;
hence
tourism
significantly
contributes to the country's revenue. As you may guess, the more
tourism
becomes crucial for states, the more downsides that they may face arises. I
strongly
believe that
tourism
adversely
affects numerous countries in
many
ways, although it brings money. Based on the traditional
culture
of societies and environmental pollution, this essay sides with the
idea
that tourism's disadvantages cannot be
ignored
.

First
and foremost, every civilization has its unique characteristic; thereby, travelers from
different
parts of the world visit countries with their
own
cultural truths and beliefs,
severely
threatening conventional
culture
. Tourists may
seriously
offend locals even if they do not intend to do this. In the
end
, overload alternation in traditional lifestyle may ruin countries' historical context.
However
, even worse, foreign visitors may bother natives with their normal behaviors in their states. This endangers the travelers' safety and
eventually
increases the crime rate.
Consequently
, a country's reputation
increasingly
degrades.

Furthermore
, every human can
be considered
as a potential polluter of the environment;
thus
, the rising of tourists' numbers increases environmental contamination
exponentially
. Visitors may throw away various materials that cannot dissolve in nature, such as plastic bags, bottles, cups, etc.
Moreover
, renting private cars or hailing taxis for going somewhere would boost air pollution. The growing rate of carbon dioxide in the atmosphere would trigger climate
change
. If we do not halt this situation, there would be nowhere worth visiting, even
live
.

To sum up,
tourism
has ups and downs like every life case,
nevertheless
, disregarding its disadvantages would
finally
damage states'
culture
and atmosphere. Income coming from
tourism
charms authorities,
yet
they should take its cons into consideration immediately. Protecting
culture
and environment from tourism' disadvantages should be two profound emphases when the
government
is looking for a solution.
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IELTS essay Tourism is becoming increasingly important as a source of revenue to many countries, but its disadvantages should not be overlooked.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
310 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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