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3. Leaders like John F. Kennedy and Martin Luther King have made important contributions to the people of the United States. Name another world leader you think is important. Give specific reasons for your choice. v.2

3. Leaders like John F. Kennedy and Martin Luther King have made important contributions to the people of the United States. Name another world leader you think is important. Give specific reasons for your choice. v. 2
It’s clear to me that leaders are one of the most important part of our lives. They try to make important contribution to their people and assiss to improve movements of their countries and can have an important rull in world. Such as John H. Kennedy and Martin Luther king that have an effective rull in U. S. country. Although there are many good reasons that other leader in another country are very usufull, I support the idea that Koorosh Kabir king in Iran was a perminent and a great man that peaple in all of world should know him for his big works that provides a better life style for future because this leads to thrive through the entire universe. Two personal reasons convince me that Koorosh Kabir was the best leader and king between all of the world and I want to describe him. One of the most important profits is the opportunity to use his numerous experiences, speeches and enormouse works. He did have massive effectfull thoughtfullness and tact in succeeding to lead to peaple and their life. He wanted to have big responsibity to get better the country and his experiences are in many books that wrote in many years ago by many authors. His life and works changed the world. For example, I study too much books about him when I go to library in near my home and I often borrow his books from my friends who have same idea about the leader. We are unanimously about the speeches which is fairly good and beautiful writing. Once one of my teacher in high schools talked about how he treated and lived in long time of his life and after that she spoke about his speeches. It was really nice and beautiful and I learn a lot. In fact, I knew him after that time. I actually love the books that are about him. As you can see in books, his vocations that makes to be great leader. An other huge advantages to lead is the chance to defend people’s rights and make peace in whole wide of areas. To order this achievement, he determined national’s and human’s rights for all of world and made calm all peaple. In history, he was unique king that had such works and was a kind, kind, great and likelly king. I love Kabir king for his works. He merits to make thankfully and gratefully celebration each year. For instance, I always connect to the internet and go to many sites that is about leaders of the world then I get news. One of events that I pay attention to it, it’s about Koroosh Kabir king. I notice this knews all times. One day I studied a statement about him in a newspaper. It was very interesting for me because it was about my favorit leader. That was written about his works. The weblog was written about father of Iran and who defent people of world and also after a while he wrote bills and rulls about human’s right. These experiences taught me that he affects not only for our life but alsofor another person in other cultures. In sum, all of the leaders have an essential rull in our life, but I think Koorosh Kabir had gread influences. Not only will his experiences profit but alsomaking peace and bills in universal community is always usefull. Eventually following the great works of him should be persued in through comprehencial world wide.
It’s
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clear
to me that
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leaders
are one of the most
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important
part of our
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lives
. They try to
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make
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important
contribution to their
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people
and
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assiss
to
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improve
movements of their
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countries
and can have an
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important
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rull
in
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world
. Such as John H. Kennedy and Martin Luther
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king
that have an effective
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rull
in U. S.
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country
. Although there are
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many
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good
reasons that other
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leader
in another
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country
are
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very
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usufull
, I support the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
that
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Koorosh
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Kabir
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king
in Iran was a
Possible spelling mistake found.
perminent
and a
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great
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man
that
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peaple
in all of
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world
should know him for his
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big
works that provides a better
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life
style for future
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
this leads to thrive through the entire universe. Two personal reasons convince me that
Possible spelling mistake found.
Koorosh
Possible spelling mistake found.
Kabir
was the best
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leader
and
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king
between
Consider using "all the".
all of the
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world
and I want to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
describe
him.

One of the most
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important
profits is the opportunity to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
his numerous
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experiences
, speeches and
Possible spelling mistake found.
enormouse
works. He did have massive
Possible spelling mistake found.
effectfull
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thoughtfullness
and tact in succeeding to lead to
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peaple
and their
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life
. He wanted to have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
Possible spelling mistake found.
responsibity
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
better the
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country
and his
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
experiences
are in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
that wrote in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
years ago by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
authors. His
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
and works
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
world
.
For example
, I study too
Use "many" with countable nouns.
much
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
about him when I go to library in near my home and I
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
borrow his
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
from my friends who have same
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
about the
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leader
. We are
unanimously
about the speeches which is
fairly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
beautiful
writing. Once one of my teacher in high schools talked about how he treated and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lived
in long time of his
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
and after that she spoke about his speeches. It was
really
nice and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
beautiful
and I learn a lot. In fact, I knew him after that time. I actually
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
that are about him. As you can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
, his vocations that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
makes
to be
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
great
leader.

This word is normally spelled as one.
An other
huge advantages to lead is the chance to defend
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
’s rights and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
peace in whole wide of areas. To order this achievement, he determined national’s and
Possible typo. Did you mean: "human rights"?
human’s rights
for all of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
world
and made calm all
Possible spelling mistake found.
peaple
. In history, he was unique
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
king
that had such works and was a kind, kind,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
great
and
Possible spelling mistake found.
likelly
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king
. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
Possible spelling mistake found.
Kabir
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king
for his works. He merits to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
thankfully
and
gratefully
celebration each year.
For instance
, I always connect to the internet and go to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
sites
that is
about
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
leaders
of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
world
then I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
news. One of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
events
that I pay attention to it, it’s about
Possible spelling mistake found.
Koroosh
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Kabir
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king
. I notice this
Possible spelling mistake found.
knews
all times. One day I studied a statement about him in a newspaper. It was
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
interesting for me
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it was about my
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favorit
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leader
. That
was written
about his works. The weblog
was written
about father of Iran and who
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defent
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
of
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world
and
also
after a while he wrote bills and
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rulls
about human’s right. These
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experiences
taught me that he affects not
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only
for our
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life
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but
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alsofor
another person in other cultures.

In sum,
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all of the
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leaders
have an essential
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rull
in our
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life
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
Possible spelling mistake found.
Koorosh
Possible spelling mistake found.
Kabir
had
Possible spelling mistake found.
gread
influences. Not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
will his
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
experiences
profit
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
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alsomaking
peace and bills in universal community is always
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usefull
.
Eventually
following the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
great
works of him should be
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persued
in through
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comprehencial
Did you mean "worldwide"?
world wide
.
6Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
53Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
42Mistakes

IELTS essay 3. Leaders like John F. Kennedy and Martin Luther King have made important contributions to the people of the United States. Name another world leader you think is important. Give specific reasons for your choice. v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
582 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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