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33. Nowadays, food has becomes easier to prepare. Has this change improved the way people live? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answers. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. v.1

33. Nowadays, food has becomes easier to prepare. Has this change improved the way people live? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answers. v. 1
With the industrialization, inhabitants are able to cook their meals in a convenient ways due to novel electronic appliances and well-prepared ingredients on supermarket.  Some citizens believe this has improved the quality of the daily lives. I partially agree with this view because some drawbacks on people's lives have also been created as well. To begin with, firstly, with the assistance of electronic appliances, people spend less time in cooking today than in the past. For example,   ancient residents burned wood to cook rice in pots, which was less efficient as comparing with electronic cookers. Moreover, nowadays, inhabitants are able to purchase well-prepared meats in supermarkets instead of processing by themselves from poultries. As a result, this will save them a tremendous amount of time. Despite having hectic daily activities,  they are still able to make healthy meals for their family. Meanwhile, they also have more time for personal relaxation,  social interaction, family playtime, travelling, and sports activities etc. Their lives will become more colourful and the standard of lives will be enhanced. However, under certain situations, the quality of lives will be diminished if the inhabitants do not pay attention to select healthy ingredients or using proper cooking tools. For instance, using canned food to cook will enhance the convenience; however, the preservatives or pesticides contained in canned food will do harm for consumers' health with unlimited intake. Electric pressure cookers may also destroy proteins inside meals and may produce toxic substances which may place human beings' health in danger. Therefore, the change of cooking may not always benefit people. In conclusion, without proper selections of nutrient food and safe cooking devices, people may expose themselves to harmful substances due to above reasons.   Therefore, in order to improve the quality of daily lives, people not only should select proper nutrient ingredients but also use proper cooking tools
With the industrialization, inhabitants are able to cook their meals in a convenient ways due to novel electronic appliances and well-prepared ingredients on supermarket.  
Some
citizens believe this has
improved
 the quality of the daily
lives
. I
partially
agree
with this view
because
some
drawbacks on
people
's
lives
have
also
been created
as well
.

To
begin
with,
firstly
, with the assistance of electronic appliances,
people
spend less time in cooking
today
than in the past.
For example
,
 
ancient residents burned wood to cook rice in pots, which was less efficient as comparing with electronic cookers.
Moreover
, nowadays, inhabitants are able to
purchase
well-prepared meats in supermarkets
instead
of processing by themselves from
poultries
.
As a result
, this will save them a tremendous amount of time. Despite having hectic daily activities,
 
they are
still
able to
make
healthy meals for their family. Meanwhile, they
also
have more time for personal relaxation,
 
social interaction, family playtime, travelling, and sports activities etc. Their
lives
will become more
colourful
and the standard of
lives
will
be enhanced
.

However
, under certain situations, the quality of
lives
will
be diminished
if the inhabitants do not pay attention to select healthy ingredients or using
proper
cooking tools.
For instance
, using canned food to cook will enhance the convenience;
however
, the preservatives or pesticides contained in canned food will do harm for consumers' health with unlimited intake. Electric pressure cookers may
also
destroy
proteins inside meals and may produce toxic substances which may place human beings' health in
danger
.
Therefore
, the
change
of cooking may not always benefit
people
.

In conclusion
, without
proper
selections of nutrient food and safe cooking devices,
people
may expose themselves to harmful substances due to above reasons.
 
Therefore
, in order to
improve
the quality of daily
lives
,
people
not
only
should select
proper
nutrient ingredients
but
also
use
proper
cooking tools
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Mistakes

IELTS essay 33. Nowadays, food has becomes easier to prepare. Has this change improved the way people live? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answers. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
302 words
8
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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