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2020-01-18: Task 2 Some TV programmes, video of violent games and other leisure activities are harmful on children. How harmful they are? What can be done to solve these problem? v.1

2020-01-18: Task 2 Some TV programmes, video of violent games and other leisure activities are harmful on children. How harmful they are? What can be done to solve these problem? v. 1
With the rampant progress of urbanization, and the introduction of online television programmes, games and smart phones have caused a massive impact on children. Moreover, these activities if not carefully monitored could be misleading and dangerous for the younger generations. In this essay, we shall discuss this topic further and also try to find a possible solution to it. Nowadays, television and video games available on the internet have provided an array of features and creativity. Furthermore, the moot problem caused by being detrimental and provocative to younger individuals. For instance, violence shown on programmes and games could be misleading, and display scenes that should not be watched by children, and thus instills destructive ideas and theories into their minds. Additionally, certain action shown can be instigated and under these circumstances, many younger individuals are often seen practising them at home or at school. However, where there is a will there is a way, and thus there be a possible solution to this issue. For example, activating parental lock on online T. V series provides a myriad of games and episodes suitable only for children. Furthermore, parents supervision can be extremely helpful in these situations as well as encouraging them to participate in outdoor activities such as football or basketball. In addition, motivating and guiding them to the right direction can certainly be incorporated. To reiterate, the younger generation is considered the future generation; therefore, indeed television, games or other activities can be detrimental in nature, nevertheless can be rectified. Similarly, it can conclude that, it is our responsibility to provide ample amount of attention for them or else there would be consequences that cannot be resolved easily.
With the rampant progress of urbanization, and the introduction of online television
programmes
,
games
and smart phones have caused a massive impact on children.
Moreover
, these activities if not
carefully
monitored could be misleading and
dangerous
for the
younger
generations. In this essay, we shall discuss this topic
further
and
also
try to find a possible solution to it.

Nowadays, television and video
games
available on the internet have provided an array of features and creativity.
Furthermore
, the moot problem caused by being detrimental and provocative to
younger
individuals.
For instance
, violence shown on
programmes
and
games
could be misleading, and display scenes that should not be
watched
by children, and
thus
instills destructive
ideas
and theories into their minds.
Additionally
, certain action shown can
be instigated
and
under these circumstances
,
many
younger
individuals are
often
seen
practising
them at home or at school.

However
, where there is a will there is a way, and
thus
there be a possible solution to this issue.
For example
, activating parental lock on online T. V series provides a myriad of
games
and episodes suitable
only
for children.
Furthermore
, parents supervision can be
extremely
helpful in these situations
as well
as encouraging them to participate in outdoor activities such as football or basketball.
In addition
, motivating and guiding them to the right direction can
certainly
be incorporated
.

To reiterate, the
younger
generation
is considered
the future generation;
therefore
,
indeed
television,
games
or other activities can be detrimental in nature,
nevertheless
can
be rectified
.
Similarly
, it can conclude that, it is our responsibility to provide ample amount of attention for them or else there would be consequences that cannot
be resolved
easily
.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Mistakes

IELTS essay 2020-01-18: Task 2 Some TV programmes, video of violent games and other leisure activities are harmful on children. How harmful they are? What can be done to solve these problem? v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
278 words
8
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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