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2020-01-18: Task 2 Some T. V. programs, videos of violent games, and other leisure activities are harmful to children. How dangerous are they? What can be done to solve these problems? v.1

2020-01-18: Task 2 Some T. V. programs, videos of violent games, and other leisure activities are harmful to children. How dangerous are they? What can be done to solve these problems? v. 1
With the rampant progress of urbanization and the introduction of online television programs, games and smart phones have caused a massive impact on children. Moreover, these activities, if not carefully monitored, could be misleading and dangerous for the younger generations. In this essay, we shall discuss this topic further and also try to find a possible solution to it. Nowadays, television and video games available on the internet have provided an array of features and creativity. Furthermore, the moot problem caused by being detrimental and provocative to younger individuals. For instance, violence shown on programs and games could be misleading, and display scenes that should not be watched by children, and thus instills destructive ideas and theories into their minds. Additionally, particular actions shown can be instigating, and under these circumstances, many younger individuals are seen practicing them at home or school. However, where there is a will, there is a way, and hence there be a possible solution to this issue. For example, activating parental lock on online T. V. Series provides a myriad of games and episodes suitable only for children. Furthermore, parent's supervision can be beneficial in these situations as well as encouraging them to participate in outdoor activities such as football or basketball. In addition to this, motivating and guiding them in the right direction can certainly be incorporated. To reiterate, the younger generation is considered the future generation; therefore, indeed television, games, or other activities can be detrimental in nature. Nevertheless, it can be rectified. Similarly, it can conclude that it is our responsibility to provide an ample amount of attention to them, or else there would be consequences that cannot be resolved quickly.
With the rampant progress of urbanization and the introduction of online television programs,
games
and smart phones have caused a massive impact on children.
Moreover
, these activities, if not
carefully
monitored, could be misleading and
dangerous
for the
younger
generations. In this essay, we shall discuss this topic
further
and
also
try to find a possible solution to it.

Nowadays, television and video
games
available on the internet have provided an array of features and creativity.
Furthermore
, the moot problem caused by being detrimental and provocative to
younger
individuals.
For instance
, violence shown on programs and
games
could be misleading, and display scenes that should not be
watched
by children, and
thus
instills destructive
ideas
and theories into their minds.
Additionally
, particular actions shown can be instigating, and
under these circumstances
,
many
younger
individuals are
seen
practicing them at home or school.

However
, where there is a will, there is a way, and
hence
there be a possible solution to this issue.
For example
, activating parental lock on online T. V. Series provides a myriad of
games
and episodes suitable
only
for children.
Furthermore
, parent's supervision can be beneficial in these situations
as well
as encouraging them to participate in outdoor activities such as football or basketball.
In addition
to this, motivating and guiding them in the right direction can
certainly
be incorporated
.

To reiterate, the
younger
generation
is considered
the future generation;
therefore
,
indeed
television,
games
, or other activities can be detrimental in nature.
Nevertheless
, it can
be rectified
.
Similarly
, it can conclude that it is our responsibility to provide an ample amount of attention to them, or else there would be consequences that cannot
be resolved
quickly
.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Mistakes

IELTS essay 2020-01-18: Task 2 Some T. V. programs, videos of violent games, and other leisure activities are harmful to children. How dangerous are they? What can be done to solve these problems? v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
279 words
8
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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