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1059 why do you think some people think that national celebrations are a waste of government money? ? would you agree or disagree with this view? v.1

1059 why do you think some people think that national celebrations are a waste of government money? ? would you agree or disagree with this view? v. 1
It is often thought by many that educational institutes should only permit intelligent pupils with excellent marks. However, some of them are of the opinion that students of all age groups and ability grades should be able to participate. In my point of view, I believe that only students with high numbers should go to the university. In the next paragraphs, I will discuss both of these views. First of all, it is more significant to participate in a course that suits your level. The reason for this is that some studies are too difficult to understand, which will increase the amount of stress. Furthermore, this will also put down your confidence and the ability to achieve the end of the course. For example, a lot of adults are providing a lot of effort but are not able to make themselves familiar with the information that is given in the lessons. However, sometimes the level is too high to receive good test results. So, that's why it is better to find a study that is suitable for you, On the other hand, some believe that numbers don't speak about the person's capability. The reason for this is that these can be changed if we try to do our best. For example, some teenagers were not putting enough effort in the college days but realized that rapports are really important to make a step higher in life. Furthermore, those children are actually really smart. Although, they are presenting it in their adulthood. All in all, sometimes it is better to give some people a change to show their actual level. To conclude, there is a group who is of the opinion that only students with high marks should be accepted at the university. However, some of them think that students from all ages and ability level should be able to attend. Furthermore, in my opinion, I believe that teenagers with good rates should participate in the higher level courses because it will be too stressful and will also decrease the confidence.
It is
often
thought
by
many
that educational institutes should
only
permit intelligent pupils with excellent marks.
However
,
some
of them are of the opinion that
students
of all age groups and ability grades should be able to participate. In my point of view, I believe that
only
students
with high numbers should go to the university. In the
next
paragraphs, I will discuss both of these views.

First of all
, it is more significant to participate in a course that suits your
level
.
The reason for this is
that
some
studies are too difficult to understand, which will increase the amount of
stress
.
Furthermore
, this will
also
put down your confidence and the ability to achieve the
end
of the course.
For example
,
a lot of
adults are providing
a lot of
effort
but
are not able to
make
themselves familiar with the information
that is
given
in the lessons.
However
,
sometimes
the
level
is too high to receive
good
test
results.
So
, that's why it is better to find a study
that is
suitable for you,

On the other hand
,
some
believe that numbers don't speak about the person's capability.
The reason for this is
that these can be
changed
if we try to do our best.
For example
,
some
teenagers
were not putting
enough
effort in the college days
but
realized that rapports are
really
important
to
make
a step higher in life.
Furthermore
, those children are actually
really
smart.
Although
, they are presenting it in their adulthood. All in all,
sometimes
it is better to give
some
people
a
change
to
show
their actual level.

To conclude
, there is a group who is of the opinion that
only
students
with high marks should be
accepted
at the university.
However
,
some
of them
think
that
students
from all ages and ability
level
should be able to attend.
Furthermore
, in my opinion, I believe that
teenagers
with
good
rates should participate in the higher
level
courses
because
it will be too stressful and will
also
decrease the confidence.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes
Learn a new language and get a new soul.
Czech Proverb

IELTS essay 1059 why do you think some people think that national celebrations are a waste of government money? ? would you agree or disagree with this view? v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
340 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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