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1. People do many different things to stay healthy. What do you do for good health? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer v.2

1. People do many different things to stay healthy. What do you do for good health? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer v. 2
Health is a very important part of our lives. People want to be happy way and live longer, so we have to take care of our health. Some people believe that diet and medicine make our health better. Others would believe that exercise is the most important than diet and medicine. In my view, We have to do exercise everyday to get a goood health for enormous reasons. To begin with, exercise is essential for our body. Through walk and even work in home, we will do some body movements that really help our body to still healthy. Take my mother in law as an example, she elder and does not walk or move a lot, as a result her activities and organs are not efficient. Actually, she has problems in heart, kidney, back and knees that worse her health and she feels sick most of the time. In fact, her doctor told us that she needs exercises so her circulation system will be effective. This experience taught me that with exercise, we can improve our health and live in a better life. Hence, in addition to the importance of exercise for our organs, it reduces stress of humans. When do some exercises, the psycological effect on the person will be acheived that leads to enhance our health. For instance, when I was in pharmacy school, I took a class in psychology which was amazing. The professor asserted that most of illnesses come from the psychological condition of the patient. He significantly declared that with a good mode, the patient will have a good health and exercise decreases the stress that has a positive effect on the health of patient. As we can clearly see exercise will improve our health dramatically. By the way of conclusion, based on the argument above, I greatly concur that exercise is worthwhile to our health. We should take sometimes to do some exercises to be at a good health.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Health
is a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
part of our
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
People
want to be
Please check whether an article is missing: "a happy".
happy
way and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
longer,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
we
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
take care of our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
believe that diet and medicine
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
better. Others would believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
exercise
is the most
Use "(important)" to make a comparison with this adjective.
important
than diet and medicine. In my view, We
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
do
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
exercise
'Everyday' is an adjective. Did you mean "every day"?
everyday
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
a
Possible spelling mistake found.
goood
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
for enormous reasons.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
exercise
is essential for our body. Through walk and even work in home, we will do
Did you mean "somebody"?
some body
movements that
really
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
our body to
still
healthy. Take my
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
mother in law
as an example,
It seems that a verb is missing after "she". Please verify.
she
elder and does not walk or
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
move
a lot,
as a result
her activities and organs are not efficient. Actually, she has problems in heart, kidney, back and knees that worse her
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
health and
she feels sick most of the time. In fact, her doctor
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
told
us that she needs
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
exercises
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
her circulation system will be effective. This experience taught me that with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
exercise
, we can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in a better life.

Hence
,
in addition
to the importance of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
exercise
for our organs, it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduces
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
of humans. When do
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
exercises
, the
Possible spelling mistake found.
psycological
effect on the person will be
Possible spelling mistake found.
acheived
that leads to enhance our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
.
For instance
, when I was in pharmacy school, I took a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
class
in psychology which was amazing. The professor asserted that
After 'most of', you should use 'the' ("most of the illnesses") or simply say "most illnesses".
most of illnesses
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
from the psychological condition of the patient. He
significantly
declared that with a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
mode, the patient will have a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
exercise
decreases the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
that has a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
effect on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
of patient.
“As” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
As
we can
clearly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
exercise
will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
dramatically
.

By the way of conclusion, based on the argument above, I
greatly
concur that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
exercise
is worthwhile to our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
. We should take
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
to do
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
exercises
to be at a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
23Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
13Mistakes

IELTS essay 1. People do many different things to stay healthy. What do you do for good health? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
325 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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