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1. Explain how young people’s behaviour is influenced by their peers. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this

1. Explain how young people’s behaviour is influenced by their peers. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this 2PVqA
Looking at the world today, it is undeniable that youngsters are encouraged by their peers, family, and teachers, however, they are more influenced by their friends. This influence is known as peer pressure. While this offers a few advantages, there are also some disadvantages that are worth considering. To embark, there are myriad benefits of such influence. Initially, the knowledge and experience that they gain through each other’s company. Peer pressure can make a valuable contribution to boosting cooperation and solidarity among students. Moreover, when the peers have good morals and character, and when members are long-time acquaintances which are known by parents and family, this influence tends to be more positive. On the other hand, a few drawbacks may be noted. When peers are not supervised or are given absolute freedom, negative consequences might mushroom. To be precise, the young people of society are the easiest target of the anti-social elements. Targeting just one member of the group is more than enough for them to bring the whole group under their influence. It can be seen then when an inquiry is made on the root cause of illegal activity or a bad habit such as smoking, the most likely cause is peer pressure. Furthermore, another vulnerable factor is the attitude of the young. They are agile, aggressive. and more likely to experiment with risk elements. Peer pressure acts as a catalyst to this behavior and this eventually ends up in catastrophes. To recapitulate, I would say that, encouragement always provides a platform to do something challenging and interesting and as similar to this if young ones follow others positively it will help them more to grow well.
Looking at the world
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
, it is undeniable that youngsters
are encouraged
by their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
peers
, family, and teachers,
however
, they are more influenced by their friends. This
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
influence
is known
as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
peer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pressure
. While
Did you mean "these"?
this
offers a few advantages, there are
also
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
disadvantages that are worth considering.

To embark, there are myriad benefits of such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
influence
.
Initially
, the knowledge and experience that they gain through each other’s
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Peer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pressure
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
a valuable contribution to boosting cooperation and solidarity among students.
Moreover
, when the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
peers
have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
morals and character, and when members are long-time acquaintances which
are known
by parents and family, this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
influence
tends to be more
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
.

On the other hand
, a few drawbacks may
be noted
. When
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
peers
are not supervised or are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
absolute freedom,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
consequences might mushroom. To be precise, the young
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
of society are the easiest target of the anti-social elements. Targeting
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
one member of the group is more than
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
for them to bring the whole group under their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
influence
. It can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
then when an inquiry
is made
on the root cause of illegal activity or a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
habit such as smoking, the most likely cause is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
peer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pressure
.
Furthermore
, another vulnerable factor is the attitude of the young. They are agile, aggressive.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
and
more likely to experiment with
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
risk
elements.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Peer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pressure
acts as a catalyst to this behavior and this
eventually
ends up in catastrophes.

To recapitulate, I would say that, encouragement always provides a platform to do something challenging and interesting and as similar to this if young ones follow others
positively
it will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
them more to grow well.
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IELTS essay 1. Explain how young people’s behaviour is influenced by their peers. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
278 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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