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write a paragraph about the results of transportation survey

write a paragraph about the results of transportation survey m3Bl1
Today, the majority of people use cars more than other vehicles, which will be best seen through a transportation survey of Austin and Texas residents on their way to work. With the 4. 0 era, machinery and components are technologies that are born more and more to satisfy the needs of customers. As we can see, that bicycle 6% and walking 3% accounted for a very low proportion in the survey process, showing that the process of improving the country is increasingly developed and people's living standards are also improved. Followed by subway and bus accounts for roughly 18% and 15%. It is worth mentioning that the percentage of people going to work by car accounts for more than half of them, up to 58%. But why do many people choose a car to go to work? Because the car is the best choice. Comfort before going to work. If there is a traffic jam, it will not be affected by the heat and dust. . . .
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Today
, the majority of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cars
more than other vehicles, which will be best
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
through a transportation survey of Austin and Texas residents on their way to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
. With the 4. 0 era, machinery and components are technologies that
are born
more and more to satisfy the needs of customers. As we can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
, that bicycle 6% and walking 3% accounted for a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
low proportion in the survey process, showing that the process of improving the country is
increasingly
developed and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
's living standards are
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improved
. Followed by subway and bus accounts for roughly 18% and 15%. It is worth mentioning that the percentage of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
going to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
car
accounts for more than half of them, up to 58%.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
why do
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many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
choose a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
car
to go to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
?
“Because” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
Because
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
car
is the best choice. Comfort
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
going to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
. If there is a traffic jam, it will not be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
affected
by the heat and dust.
Don't put a space before the full stop
.
Don't put a space before the full stop
.
Don't put a space before the full stop
.
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IELTS academic write a paragraph about the results of transportation survey

Academic
  American English
1 paragraphs
168 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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