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The diagrams illustrate stages involved in making cherry jam.

The diagrams illustrate stages involved in making cherry jam. eADrx
As can be seen that there are nine steps in this process, beginning with collecting cherries from cherry trees and ending with labeling the cherry jam jars which are ready for sale. In the first stage of the process, a sheet is spread under the tree, by shaking the tree, cherries fall down to the sheet. After that, the cherries are collected and delivered by a truck to a treatment plant where they undergo futher processing. Next, the leaves and stems are removed from the cherries, and then the cherries are washed by water in order to remove other impurities. Following this, the stones are taken out of the middle of cherries. In the next stage of the process, the cherries are cooked and mixed with extra ingredients such as lemon juice, sugar and pectin, the mixture is cooked until it is ready to be check by the quality controller. If it meets the standards, they are poured into glass jars, packaged and labeled.
As can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
that there are nine steps in this process, beginning with collecting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cherries
from cherry trees and ending with labeling the cherry jam jars which are ready for sale.

In the
first
stage of the process, a sheet
is spread
under the tree, by shaking the tree,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cherries
fall down to the sheet. After that, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cherries
are collected
and delivered by a truck to a treatment plant where they undergo
Possible spelling mistake found.
futher
processing.
Next
, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
leaves
and stems
are removed
from the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cherries
, and then the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cherries
are washed
by water in order to remove other impurities. Following this, the stones
are taken
out of the middle of cherries.

In the
next
stage of the process, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cherries
are cooked
and mixed with extra ingredients such as lemon juice, sugar and pectin, the mixture
is cooked
until it is ready to be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
check
by the quality controller. If it meets the standards, they
are poured
into glass jars, packaged and labeled.
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IELTS academic The diagrams illustrate stages involved in making cherry jam.

Academic
  American English
3 paragraphs
164 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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