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This chart shows the energy consumption of an average Australian household and how proportion of emitting greenhouse gas in each type of active.

This chart shows the energy consumption of an average Australian household and how proportion of emitting greenhouse gas in each type of active. 7DEb
This chart shows the energy consumption of an average Australian household and how proportion of emitting greenhouse gas in each type of active. First, the most bigger different informations are using heating and other appliances, relate to 42% and 15%, but they going upside down in gas emissions, which is 15% and 28%. Secondly, using energy of lighting and refrigeration are similar change in greenhouse gas emissions. The former using 4% energy and product double number of emissions to 8%. The latter have the same situation about 7% in using energy but emit 14% greenhouse gas. The last two parts of things are water heating which is second large source of using energy and the smallest consuming energy one = cooling. Indeed, there are just a marginally change in greenhouse gas emissions which grow from 30% to 32% and rise from 2% to 3%.
This chart
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
energy
consumption of an average Australian household and how proportion of emitting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
greenhouse
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
gas
in each type of active.

First
, the
Use only "bigger" (without 'most') when you use the comparative.
most bigger
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
The word 'informations' is a legal term. In standard English, the word 'information' is a non-count noun. Did you mean "information"?
informations
are using heating and other appliances, relate to 42% and 15%,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
Did you mean "they're going", "they are going", or "they were going"?
they going
upside down in
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gas
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emissions
, which is 15% and 28%.

Secondly
, using
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energy
of lighting and refrigeration are similar
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
in
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greenhouse
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
gas
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
emissions
. The former using 4%
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
energy
and product double number of
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emissions
to 8%. The latter have the same situation about 7% in using
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
energy
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
emit 14%
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
greenhouse
gas.

Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
The
last two parts of things are water heating which is second large source of using
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energy
and the smallest consuming
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energy
one = cooling.
Indeed
, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
a
marginally
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
greenhouse
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
gas
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
emissions
which grow from 30% to 32% and rise from 2% to 3%.
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IELTS academic This chart shows the energy consumption of an average Australian household and how proportion of emitting greenhouse gas in each type of active.

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
144 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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