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the two maps show road access to a city hospital in 2007 and in 2010

the two maps show road access to a city hospital in 2007 and in 2010 ggo7
Both maps display road entry to a city hospital of two different years (2007 and 2010)A city hospital is surrounded by the ring road. Hospital road is joined by both the ring road and the city road. There were three bus stops on each sides of the hospital road. To the east of the hospital road, there was a common car parking area for both public and staff. Over the period, there was a construction of two roundabouts and a bus station. At the same time, a public car park was relocated to the east of a city hospital. In 2010, at both ends of the hospital road, there was a development of roundarounds; one intersecting with the ring road and other with the city road. Bus stops were removed and replaced with a bus station to the west of the hospital road which was joined to both roundarounds. To the east, only car parking for staff was located whereas public car parking was relocated to the east to a city hospital.
Both maps display
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road
entry to a city
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hospital
of two
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
years (2007 and 2010)A city
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hospital
is surrounded
by the ring
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road
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Hospital
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
road
is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
joined
by both the ring
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road
and the city
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road
. There were three bus
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stops
on each
The noun should be probably in the singular form: "side"?
sides
of the
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hospital
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
road
. To the east of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hospital
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
road
, there was a common
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
car
parking area for both public and staff. Over the period, there was a construction of two roundabouts and a bus station. At the same time, a public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
car
park
was relocated
to the east of a city
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hospital
. In 2010, at both ends of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hospital
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
road
, there was a development of
Possible spelling mistake found.
roundarounds
; one intersecting with the ring
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road
and other with the city
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road
. Bus
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stops
were removed
and replaced with a bus station to the west of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hospital
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
road
which was
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
joined
to both
Possible spelling mistake found.
roundarounds
. To the east,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
car
parking for staff
was located
whereas public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
car
parking
was relocated
to the east to a city
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hospital
.
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IELTS academic the two maps show road access to a city hospital in 2007 and in 2010

Academic
  American English
1 paragraphs
172 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
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  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
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    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
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    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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