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The two diagrams illustrate the stages in the life cycle of silkworms and the way to produce silk cloth.

The two diagrams illustrate the stages in the life cycle of silkworms and the way to produce silk cloth. BLEDj
The two diagrams illustrate the stages in the life cycle of silkworms and the way to produce silk cloth. Overall, the silkworm has four life stages from egg to silkworm butterfly and there are five stages to produce silk cloth. Firstly, eggs are laid on the mulberry leaf surface, with each time silkworm butterfly adult can lay 150 to 300 eggs. It takes around 10 days to hatch into a larva and they feed on the mulberry leaf for 4 to 6 weeks until they reach a certain size and receive enough nutrition. Afterward, the larva starts releasing silk to create a cocoon surrounding them, and that process lasts for 3-8 days. After finishing they hide inside the cocoon to continue their pupal stage for 16 days before molting into a silkworm butterfly adult. The life cycle starts all over again. At the first stage of the process of producing silk cloth, cocoons are selected manually, and then they are boiled in hot water, at which stage the workers have to stir in order to soften and peel out the cocoon. After that, it is unwinded by the workers to find out the root of silk to pull out as long as possible, especially each silkworm cocoon can pull out 300-900 meters of thread. Subsequently, to make the silk thread stronger, people twist 10 threads into 1 before wrapping it in a dedicated silk reel and can also be dyed or switch to the last stage to weave into silk cloth before dying.
The two diagrams illustrate the
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stages
in the life cycle of silkworms and the way to produce
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
silk
cloth.
Overall
, the silkworm has four life
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stages
from egg to silkworm butterfly and there are five
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stages
to produce
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
silk
cloth.

Firstly
, eggs
are laid
on the mulberry leaf surface, with each time silkworm butterfly adult can lay 150 to 300 eggs. It takes around 10 days to hatch into a
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
larva and
they feed on the mulberry leaf for 4 to 6 weeks until they reach a certain size and receive
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
nutrition. Afterward, the larva
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
starts
releasing
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silk
to create a
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cocoon
surrounding them, and that process lasts for 3-8 days. After finishing they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hide
inside the
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cocoon
to continue their pupal
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stage
for 16 days
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
molting into a silkworm butterfly adult. The life cycle
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
starts
all over again.

At the
first
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stage
of the process of producing
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silk
cloth,
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cocoons
are selected
manually
, and then they
are boiled
in hot water, at which
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stage
the workers
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
stir in order to soften and peel out the
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cocoon
. After that, it is
Possible spelling mistake. Did you mean "unwound", the past tense form of the verb 'unwind'?
unwinded
by the workers to find out the root of
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silk
to pull out as long as possible,
especially
each silkworm
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cocoon
can pull out 300-900 meters of thread.
Subsequently
, to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
the
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silk
thread stronger,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
twist 10 threads into 1
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
wrapping it in a dedicated
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silk
reel and can
also
be dyed
or switch to the last
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
stage
to weave into
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
silk
cloth
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
dying.

IELTS academic The two diagrams illustrate the stages in the life cycle of silkworms and the way to produce silk cloth.

Academic
  American English
3 paragraphs
253 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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