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The table indicates the rate of 6-11 and 12-16-year-old boys taking part in various sports in Britain in 2020.

The table indicates the rate of 6-11 and 12-16-year-old boys taking part in various sports in Britain in 2020. G3NRm
The table indicates the rate of 6-11 and 12-16-year-old boys taking part in various sports in Britain in 2020. Overall, it is evident that while football gained popularity in the UK for both age groups, boys did not pay much attention to swimming. It is also noticeable that boys aged 6-11 eagerly joined than the other group. For the younger group, the ratio of school boys playing football took the lead with 87%, while only 35% of the figure for the second popular activity - basketball was significantly lower, at 35%. To the age group, the number of boys engaging in cricket accounted for 45%. Meanwhile, the bottom position belonged to the proportion of school boys going swimming with 19%, which was exactly 4% lower than that of rugby. For the 12-16-year-old boys, 78% reflected for the number of teenboys playing football, which was also considered as the top scorer in the survey given. While 34% of boys aged 12-16 showed their interest in playing cricket. Swimming was the least favoured by this group, at only 19%. Both sports, namely basketball and rugby, shared a similar pattern, with 25% and 21% correspondingly.
The table indicates the rate of 6-11 and 12-16-year-
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
boys
taking part in various sports in Britain in 2020.

Overall
, it is evident that while football gained popularity in the UK for both age
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
groups
,
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boys
did not pay much attention to swimming. It is
also
noticeable that
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boys
aged 6-11
eagerly
Use "(joined)" to make a comparison with this adjective.
joined
than the other group.

For the younger
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
group
, the ratio of school
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boys
playing football took the lead with 87%, while
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
35% of the figure for the second popular activity
Consider using an m-dash if you do not want to join two words.
-
basketball was
significantly
lower, at 35%. To the age
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
group
, the number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
boys
engaging in cricket accounted for 45%. Meanwhile, the bottom position belonged to the proportion of school
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
boys
going swimming with 19%, which was exactly 4% lower than that of rugby.

For the 12-16-year-
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
boys
, 78% reflected for the number of
Possible spelling mistake found.
teenboys
playing football, which was
also
considered as the top scorer in the survey
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
.
“While” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
While
34% of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
boys
aged 12-16
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
showed
their interest in playing cricket. Swimming was the least
Possible spelling mistake. 'favoured' is British English.
favoured
by this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
group
, at
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
19%. Both sports,
namely
basketball and rugby, shared a similar pattern, with 25% and 21%
correspondingly
.
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IELTS academic The table indicates the rate of 6-11 and 12-16-year-old boys taking part in various sports in Britain in 2020.

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
192 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
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    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
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    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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