Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

The table illustrates the proportion of employees in a variety of seven fields in California in 2010 and a projection for percentages in 2030

The table illustrates the proportion of employees in a variety of seven fields in California in 2010 and a projection for percentages in 2030 6mPxK
The table illustrates the proportion of employees in a variety of seven fields in California in 2010 and a projection for percentages in 2030. Overall, the percentage of Health, Services, and Information Technology sectors is expected to increase in 2030 while the opposite is true for Government, Manufacturing/Agriculture, and Low Wage sectors. It is also obvious that Health sector is predicted to be the highest percentage in 2030 and Business/Administration will remain stable. As can be seen, Services and Information Technology sectors are expected to rise marginally from 17% to 20% and from 8% to 10% in 2030, respectively. Beside that, the expectation is that the sector of Health will be experience the highest percentage in 2030, it will nearly double 2010 with 23%. On the other hand, predictions show that the percentage of Government, Manufacturing/Agriculture fields will experience gradually decline in 2030 from 18% to 14% and 8% to 4%. Moreover, the Low Wage employment rate will be decreasing the most from 24% to 16% by 2030. The only sector which is estimated to witness a stability is Business/Administration. It will account for 13% over the period.
The table illustrates the proportion of employees in a variety of seven fields in California in 2010 and a projection for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
percentages
in 2030.
Overall
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
percentage
of Health, Services, and Information Technology
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sectors
is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
expected
to increase in 2030 while the opposite is true for
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Government
, Manufacturing/Agriculture, and Low Wage
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sectors
. It is
also
obvious that Health
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sector
is predicted
to be the highest
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
percentage
in 2030 and Business/Administration will remain stable.

As can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
, Services and Information Technology
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sectors
are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
expected
to rise
marginally
from 17% to 20% and from 8% to 10% in 2030,
respectively
. Beside that, the expectation is that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sector
of Health will be experience the highest
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
percentage
in 2030, it will
nearly
double 2010 with 23%.

On the other hand
, predictions
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
percentage
of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Government
, Manufacturing/Agriculture fields will experience
gradually
decline in 2030 from 18% to 14% and 8% to 4%.
Moreover
, the Low Wage employment rate will be decreasing the most from 24% to 16% by 2030.

The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sector
which
is estimated
to witness a stability is Business/Administration. It will account for 13% over the period.
What do you think?
  • This is funny writingFunny
  • I love this writingLove
  • This writing has blown my mindWow
  • It made me angryAngry
  • It made me sadSad

IELTS academic The table illustrates the proportion of employees in a variety of seven fields in California in 2010 and a projection for percentages in 2030

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
188 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Recent posts
  • 6.5band
    the pie chart reveal the top five countries with the highest crime rates of theft & robbery and kidnapping for the year 2013.
    The pie charts provide information, in percentage, regarding the proportion of crime rates of theft, robbery and kidnapping in five different nations during the year 2013. Overall, the majority of crime rates of theft, robbery and kidnapping was observed in Mexico; whereas, Chile had the least rate...
  • 5band
    The diagram below show the product life cycle of the car
    A superficial look at the pictorial provided reveals data on the serviceable life of the car output. The procedure initiating from conglomerating crude utensils in order to manufacture it to recycling materials and parts. Turning to details, the raw material are accumulated in order to beget the c...
  • 6band
    the chart show the information about the number of customers at three different restaurants during five-day period.
    The line chart compares the number of clients per day who is coming to three restaurants, namely Mama’s Café, Good Eats and Tom’s Diner over five-day period from day one to day five. Overall, it is clear that Tom’s Diner has the lowest number of clients in three restaurants. While clients who come ...
  • 6.5band
    Summarize the main points
    The two maps above illustrate all the changes that the city of Stokeford went through from 1930 to 2010. This report summarizes the most significant ones over this 80-year period. Overall, the most noticeable change is the replacement of the farmland and the shops by a residential area whereas the ...
  • 6.5band
    The table below shows the number of visits to the UK by overseas residents between 1975 and 1998.
    The table illustrates the number of times the United Kingdom was visited by foreigners for over twenty-three years. The unit for figures are expressed in millions. Overall, the main reason why travelers often visit UK was because of leisure activity. It can be clearly seen that a huge number of vis...
  • 6band
    sawadikhap longkhanh na khrap
    The bar chart compares the differences between the figure for men and women in 6 genres of educational setting in the UK in the year 2010. It can be seen from the bar chart that nursery/ pre-school and primary had women outweigh than men. By constrast, men in worked in university excessive clearly ...





Get more results for topic:
  • The table illustrates the proportion of employees in a variety of seven fields in California in 2010 and a projection for percentages in 2030