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The table chart illustrates the illustrate the information about traveling in match, June, September and December months by distinctive categories in 2002. The data has been given in the percentage.

The table chart illustrates the illustrate the information about traveling in match, June, September and December months by distinctive categories in 2002. The data has been given in the percentage. keqeR
From the overall, it can be vividly manifested that the highest commuting by business traveler in match months while, opposite trend followed by others. In detail, in March month business visitors were visit on trip nearly 73% whilst sharply decline observed to holiday visitors which was 18% then business travelers were 29% in June month. There had been a dramatic rose up seen for holidays it was 54%. Moreover, business travelers were fifty percent in September month. Whereas, there was sharply went down comprised in holidays it was near 30%. then in the December month business and holiday commuting were 34%to35% respectively. Moving to the rest of data, in march month only 6% families members were visit on trip. Nevertheless, other visitors were visited tiny chunk. Furthermore, family commuters were 13% in June then a large went down observed in others there was four percent. Nonetheless, family visitors were 11% in September it was large decline in others travelers which was approximately 5% at the end of month a large surged up noticed in family commuters which was 26% whereas dramatic went down seen others.
From the
overall
, it can be
vividly
manifested that the highest commuting by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traveler
in match
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
months
while, opposite trend followed by others. In detail, in March
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
month
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
visitors
were
Consider using a past participle here: "visited".
visit
on trip
nearly
73% whilst
sharply
decline observed to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
holiday
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
visitors
which was 18% then
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travelers
were 29% in June
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
month
. There had been a dramatic rose up
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
holidays
it was 54%.
Moreover
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travelers
were fifty percent in September
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
month
.
“Whereas” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
Whereas
, there was
sharply
went down comprised in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
holidays
it was near 30%.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
then
in the December
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
month
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
holiday
commuting were 34%to35%
respectively
. Moving to the rest of data, in
The month "March" needs to be capitalized.
march
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
month
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
6%
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
families
members were
Consider using a past participle here: "visited".
visit
on trip.
Nevertheless
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
visitors
were visited
tiny chunk.
Furthermore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
commuters were 13% in June then a large went down observed in others there was four percent. Nonetheless,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
visitors
were 11% in September it was large decline in others
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travelers
which was approximately 5% at the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
month
a large surged up noticed in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
commuters which was 26% whereas dramatic went down
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
others.
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IELTS academic The table chart illustrates the illustrate the information about traveling in match, June, September and December months by distinctive categories in 2002. The data has been given in the percentage.

Academic
  American English
1 paragraphs
185 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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