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The provided map illustrates the two proposals for the supermarket in the Garlson town which has approximately 65 thousand people.

The provided map illustrates the two proposals for the supermarket in the Garlson town which has approximately 65 thousand people. MqBgL
The provided map illustrates the two proposals for the supermarket in the Garlson town which has approximately 65 thousand people. The initial difference is the first choice of location is on the rural side whereas the second proposal lies in the center of the town. The S1 area locates on the northwest side of the town beside the main road connecting from Industry to Hindon with a population of 10 thousand. In addition to that, S1 has railways line access which can be used for the transportation of goods to the shop. The S2 area lies in the south of the city in the town center which has no traffic, is surrounded by industrial areas, and has a railway line facility. Moreover, S2 is reachable to the southside housing estate as well as northside estate too, with accessibility to Bransdon and Cransdon which has a population of more than 15 thousand. Finally, it can be seen that S1 is far from both the housing areas while S2 is nearer with access to rail and road also.
The provided map illustrates the two proposals for the supermarket in the
Possible spelling mistake found.
Garlson
town which has approximately 65 thousand
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
.

The initial difference is the
first
choice of location is on the rural side whereas the second proposal lies in the center of the town.

Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
The
S1
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
area
locates on the northwest side of the town beside the main road connecting from Industry to
Possible spelling mistake found.
Hindon
with a population of 10 thousand.
In addition
to that, S1 has railways line access which can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
for the transportation of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
goods
to the shop.

The S2
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
area
lies in the south of the city in the town center which has no traffic,
is surrounded
by industrial
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
areas
, and has a railway line facility.
Moreover
, S2 is reachable to the
Possible spelling mistake found.
southside
housing estate
as well
as
Possible spelling mistake found.
northside
estate too, with accessibility to
Possible spelling mistake found.
Bransdon
and
Possible spelling mistake found.
Cransdon
which has a population of more than 15 thousand.

Finally
, it can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
that S1 is far from both the housing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
areas
while S2 is nearer with access to rail and road
also
.
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IELTS academic The provided map illustrates the two proposals for the supermarket in the Garlson town which has approximately 65 thousand people.

Academic
  American English
5 paragraphs
176 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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