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The provided bar chart compares the proportion of expenditures for 5 separate fields in four developed countries in 2009. Overall, it is seen that, of all categories, housing was the field to which significant amount of money was allocated, while the figures for health care and clothing together ranked last. In more detail, in united states, among 4 separate fields housing stood first with nearly 25%, followed by transportation, to be at about a fifth; however there was a wide disparity in outlays of heath care and food, as the former was greater than the latter by a margin of 5%. In addition, clothing accounted for a mere 4%. For Canada, housing and transportation shared similar proportions, about 20%, with money spent on food being responsible for 15%. Meanwhile, the contribution of health formed 4%, slightly less than clothing with virtually 3% The British spent the greatest quantity of means on housing, which was higher than health care by a disparity of staggering 30%. Moreover,

The provided bar chart compares the proportion of expenditures for 5 separate fields in four developed countries in 2009. Overall, it is seen that, of all categories, housing was the field to which significant amount of money was allocated, while the figures for health care and clothing together ranked last. In more detail, in united states, among 4 separate fields housing stood first with nearly 25%, followed by transportation, to be at about a fifth; however there was a wide disparity in outlays of heath care and food, as the former was greater than the latter by a margin of 5%. In addition, clothing accounted for a mere 4%. For Canada, housing and transportation shared similar proportions, about 20%, with money spent on food being responsible for 15%. Meanwhile, the contribution of health formed 4%, slightly less than clothing with virtually 3% The British spent the greatest quantity of means on housing, which was higher than health care by a disparity of staggering 30%. Moreover, GPOe
The provided bar chart compares the proportion of expenditures for 5 separate fields in four developed countries in 2009. Overall, it is seen that, of all categories, housing was the field to which significant amount of money was allocated, while the figures for health care and clothing together ranked last. In more detail, in united states, among 4 separate fields housing stood first with nearly 25%, followed by transportation, to be at about a fifth; however there was a wide disparity in outlays of heath care and food, as the former was greater than the latter by a margin of 5%. In addition, clothing accounted for a mere 4%. For Canada, housing and transportation shared similar proportions, about 20%, with money spent on food being responsible for 15%. Meanwhile, the contribution of health formed 4%, slightly less than clothing with virtually 3% The British spent the greatest quantity of means on housing, which was higher than health care by a disparity of staggering 30%. Moreover, although food and housing contributed identical shares, 20% and 24% respectively, healthcare and clothing were the lowest among 4 fields. The most significant proportion of money was spent on housing and food by the Japanese, nearly a fifth and a quarter, correspondingly, while transportation made up a fifth being greater than both health care and clothing with 5 %.
The provided bar chart compares the proportion of expenditures for 5 separate fields in four
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
developed countries
in 2009.

Overall
, it is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
that, of all categories, housing was the field to which significant amount of money
was allocated
, while the figures for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
care
and clothing together ranked last.

In more detail, in
The proper noun "United States" needs to be capitalized.
united states
, among 4 separate fields housing stood
first
with
nearly
25%, followed by transportation, to be at about a fifth;
however
there was a wide disparity in outlays of heath
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
care
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
, as the former was greater than the latter by a margin of 5%.
In addition
, clothing accounted for a mere 4%.

For Canada, housing and transportation shared similar proportions, about 20%, with money spent on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
being responsible for 15%. Meanwhile, the contribution of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
formed 4%,
slightly
less than clothing with
virtually
3%

The British spent the greatest quantity of means on housing, which was higher than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
care
by a disparity of staggering 30%.
Moreover
, although
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
and housing contributed identical shares, 20% and 24%
respectively
, healthcare and clothing were the lowest among 4 fields.

The most significant proportion of money
was spent
on housing and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
by the Japanese,
nearly
a fifth and a quarter,
correspondingly
, while transportation made up a fifth being greater than both
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
care
and clothing with 5 %.
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IELTS academic The provided bar chart compares the proportion of expenditures for 5 separate fields in four developed countries in 2009. Overall, it is seen that, of all categories, housing was the field to which significant amount of money was allocated, while the figures for health care and clothing together ranked last. In more detail, in united states, among 4 separate fields housing stood first with nearly 25%, followed by transportation, to be at about a fifth; however there was a wide disparity in outlays of heath care and food, as the former was greater than the latter by a margin of 5%. In addition, clothing accounted for a mere 4%. For Canada, housing and transportation shared similar proportions, about 20%, with money spent on food being responsible for 15%. Meanwhile, the contribution of health formed 4%, slightly less than clothing with virtually 3% The British spent the greatest quantity of means on housing, which was higher than health care by a disparity of staggering 30%. Moreover,

Academic
  American English
5 paragraphs
224 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
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    Present relevant ideas
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    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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