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The pie chart represents the percentage of different employment sectors of graduates from Brighton University in the year 2019.

The pie chart represents the percentage of different employment sectors of graduates from Brighton University in the year 2019. 2ook
The pie chart represents the percentage of different employment sectors of graduates from Brighton University in the year 2019. Overall, it is clear from the chart that service industries were the most popular industries to work at for the Brighton University graduates in 2019. It can also be seen that the manufacturing industry, education and politics&government were following service industries in terms of popularity. The rest of the graduates were employed in other various fields. The chart reveals that the greatest proportion of students tended to work in service industries after graduation, as this sector accounted for nearly a third of the whole percentage. On the other hand, the manufacturing industry and education made up 16. 3% and 14. 7 respectively. In addition, politics&government comprised just over one tenth of employment sectors. Other students chose to work in other different fields, which accounted for nearly 23% of the chart, with sport and charity being the least popular, while science&technology and transortation%warehousing contributing the most to that 23%.
The pie
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
chart
represents the percentage of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
employment sectors of graduates from Brighton University in the year 2019.

Overall
, it is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
from the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
chart
that service
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
industries
were the most popular
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
industries
to work at for the Brighton University graduates in 2019. It can
also
be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
that the manufacturing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
industry
, education and politics&
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
were following service
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
industries
in terms of popularity. The rest of the graduates
were employed
in other various fields.

The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
chart
reveals that the greatest proportion of students tended to work in service
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
industries
after graduation, as this sector accounted for
nearly
a third of the whole percentage.
On the other hand
, the manufacturing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
industry
and education made up 16. 3% and 14. 7
respectively
.
In addition
, politics&
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
comprised
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
over one tenth of employment sectors.

Other students chose to work in other
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
fields, which accounted for
nearly
23% of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
chart
, with sport and charity being the least popular, while
Possible spelling mistake found.
science&technology
and
Possible spelling mistake found.
transortation%warehousing
contributing the most to that 23%.
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IELTS academic The pie chart represents the percentage of different employment sectors of graduates from Brighton University in the year 2019.

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
167 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
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    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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