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The plans show changes in a public park from when it first opened in 1920 to now.

The plans show changes in a public park from when it first opened in 1920 to now. 0w5gG
The plans illustrate the changes in Grange Park from its opening in 1920 to the present day today. Overall, a plethora of changes have been carried out in the park with rose gardens being the only thing that were constant. The park in 1920 had a fountain in its center and three rose gardens, two near the entrance of Arnold avenue and one near the Eldon street. Eventually, a bigger rose garden was built in the center with seating area surrounding all four sides. Only one rose garden remained untouched which still remains in the near the Arnold avenue. The children's play area is built over what was a pond for water plans, and the adjoining rose garden was taken over by a cafe. One of the biggest transformation was building an amphitheater for concerts in place of a small stage for musicians, the amphitheater has seating on front of it as well. A water feature has been constructed over what used to be a glass house which also has the entrance for an underground car park next to it.
The plans illustrate the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
in Grange
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Park
from its opening in 1920 to the present day
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
.

Overall
, a plethora of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
have
been carried
out in the
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park
with
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rose
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gardens
being the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
thing that were constant.

The
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park
in 1920 had a fountain in its center and three
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rose
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
gardens
, two near the entrance of Arnold avenue and one near the Eldon street.
Eventually
, a bigger
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rose
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
garden
was built
in the center with seating area surrounding all four sides.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Only
one
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rose
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
garden
remained untouched which
still
remains in
Duplicated 'the' in the phrase: 'the near the'. Did you mean "near the"?
the near the
Arnold avenue.

The children's play area
is built
over what was a pond for water plans, and the adjoining
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rose
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
garden
was taken
over by a
'cafe' is an imported foreign expression, which originally has a diacritic. Consider using "café"
cafe
. One of the biggest
Please check whether a plural form of 'transformation' should be used.
transformation
was building an amphitheater for concerts in place of a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
stage for musicians, the amphitheater has seating on front of it
as well
. A water feature has
been constructed
over what
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to be a glass
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
which
also
has the entrance for an underground car
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
park
next
to it.
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IELTS academic The plans show changes in a public park from when it first opened in 1920 to now.

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
180 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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