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The pie charts illustrate the time spent on different activities in the given years of 1958 and 2008 .

The pie charts illustrate the time spent on different activities in the given years of 1958 and 2008. 2KM8j
Overall, it can be clearly seen that most of the time was spent on working in both the years. According to the diagrams, in 1958 adults spent most of the time on working with 33 percent and least time spent on travel to work with 2 percent. Adults spent similar time on working and sleeping with 33 percent. The percentage was 6% of other interests or playing sports. Then, adults spent 19% time with family and friends. In 2008, adults spent least time on friends and family. On the other interests or playing sports and travel to work time was similar spent with 8 percent by adults. Further, the highest percentage of working with 41%. Nextly, adults spent time on sleeping and relaxing at home with 25% and 13 percent respectively.
Overall
, it can be
clearly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
that most of the
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time
was
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spent
on
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working
in both the years. According to the diagrams, in 1958
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adults
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spent
most of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
on
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working
with 33
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percent
and least
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time
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spent
on travel to work with 2
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percent
.
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Adults
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spent
similar
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
and sleeping with 33
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percent
. The percentage was 6% of other interests or playing sports. Then,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
adults
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spent
19%
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
with family and friends. In 2008,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
adults
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spent
A determiner is probably missing here: "the least".
least
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
on friends and family. On the other interests or playing sports and travel to work
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
was similar
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spent
with 8
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
percent
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
adults
.
Further
, the highest percentage of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
with 41%.
Possible spelling mistake found.
Nextly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
adults
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spent
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
on sleeping and relaxing at home with 25% and 13
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
percent
respectively
.

IELTS academic The pie charts illustrate the time spent on different activities in the given years of 1958 and 2008.

Academic
  American English
1 paragraphs
131 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
4.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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