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The percentage of people giving money to the charity

The percentage of people giving money to the charity 7Wkoy
We can see that ages 18-25 in 1990 more pople donate money in comparison with those same ages but in 2010. People from 26-35 in 2010 donate lees tha people i 1990. the highest mount f donetions goes to people of ages 36-50 in 1990. People of ages 36-50 of 1990 and people of 51-65 of 2010 donate the sema amount of money wich is 35%. Theres is a really shor differences of percentage of money between people that are 65 years old or more in 1990 and 2010. We can say that in 1990 there were more people that gives money than in 2010.
We can
see
that
ages
18-25 in 1990 more
pople
donate
money
in comparison
with those same
ages
but
in 2010.
People
from 26-35 in 2010 donate lees
tha
people
i 1990.
the
highest mount f
donetions
goes to
people
of
ages
36-50 in 1990.
People
of
ages
36-50 of 1990 and
people
of 51-65 of 2010 donate the
sema
amount of
money
wich
is 35%.
Theres
is a
really
shor
differences of percentage of
money
between
people
that are 65 years
old
or more in 1990 and 2010. We can say that in 1990 there were more
people
that gives
money
than in 2010.
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IELTS academic The percentage of people giving money to the charity

Academic
  American English
1 paragraphs
105 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
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  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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