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The percentage of cool energy in European countries .

The percentage of cool energy in European countries. 5392B
The diagram illustrates the highest energy production of some European countries from 1995 to 2010. Overall, it can be seen that Denmark and Germany have a similar pattern falling sharply and Sweden and France fall gradually, again by similar rates. Denmark and Germany stood at 60 % in the beginning. There was a gradual fall in 1998 with the rate of 35 %. After that 1999 saw sharp fall in the percentage of 20 in Denmark, bit Germany hit a low of at about 6%. From 2005 to 2007 the percentage remained constantly in Denmark. But in 2007 it fell gradually in 10 %. In Germany this indicator rose stedily at about 18 %. France and Sweden stood at 35 %. The percentage of the energy fell gradually at about 25 %. There was a slight fluctuation from 1998 to 2004. Finally, it unchanged till 2010.
The diagram illustrates the highest energy production of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
European countries from 1995 to 2010.
Overall
, it can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
that Denmark and Germany have a similar pattern falling
sharply
and Sweden and France fall
gradually
, again by similar rates. Denmark and Germany stood at 60 % in the beginning. There was a gradual fall in 1998 with the rate of 35 %. After that 1999
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
saw
sharp fall in the percentage of 20 in Denmark, bit Germany hit a low of at about 6%. From 2005 to 2007 the percentage remained
constantly
in Denmark.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
in 2007 it fell
gradually
in 10 %. In Germany this indicator rose
Possible spelling mistake found.
stedily
at about 18 %. France and Sweden stood at 35 %. The percentage of the energy fell
gradually
at about 25 %. There was a slight fluctuation from 1998 to 2004.
Finally
,
It seems that a verb is missing after "it". Please verify.
it
unchanged till 2010.
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IELTS academic The percentage of cool energy in European countries.

Academic
  American English
1 paragraphs
146 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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