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The par chart compares the normal electrical consumption

The par chart compares the normal electrical consumption WqVGa
The par chart compares the normal electrical consumption for five different home activities in America. The results are measured by watts and calssified by day hours. Not surprisingly, Power usage is at it's least after mednight, increases gradually and fluctuate after early morning and reach its peack after the evening. Furthermore, exept cold appliances, which tend to be constant and at economic levels (around 30 watts), almost all activites usage of electricity are similar in avarage. Entertainment starts at approximitaly 75 watts and remain stable until 6 a. m. . After this, their usage tends to go up to reach at 175 watts at 8 p. m. . In addition, heating and lighting and cooking, waching and drying follow the same pattern. For the former, startting by around 180 watts and go up to 200 watts between 8 and 10 p. m, and for the former, begin from 40 watts and reach their maximun usage earlier at 6 p. m. of around 210 watts. However, the later statrt their downward trend earlier at 8 p. m. Other activites fluctuate more than the mentioned ones. They start from 190 wats at mednight followed by downward trend until 6 a. m. . Later, a significant rise is happened followed by another flactuation from 2 to 6 p. m. when they start to go down again.
The par chart compares the normal electrical consumption for five
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
home activities in America. The results
are measured
by watts and
Possible spelling mistake found.
calssified
by day hours.

Not
surprisingly
, Power
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
usage
is at
Did you mean "its" (possessive pronoun) instead of 'it's' (short form of 'it is')?
it's
least after
Possible spelling mistake found.
mednight
, increases
gradually
and fluctuate after early morning and reach its
Possible spelling mistake found.
peack
after the evening.
Furthermore
,
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exept
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
cold
appliances, which tend to be constant and at economic levels (around 30 watts), almost all
Possible spelling mistake found.
activites
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
usage
of electricity are similar in
Possible spelling mistake found.
avarage
.

Entertainment
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
starts
at
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approximitaly
75 watts and remain stable until 6 a. m.
Don't put a space before the full stop
.
After this, their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
usage
tends to go up to reach at 175 watts at 8 p. m.
Don't put a space before the full stop
.
In addition
, heating and lighting and cooking,
Possible spelling mistake found.
waching
and drying follow the same pattern. For the former,
Possible spelling mistake found.
startting
by around 180 watts and go up to 200 watts between 8 and 10 p. m, and for the former,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
from 40 watts and reach their
Possible spelling mistake found.
maximun
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
usage
earlier at 6 p. m. of around 210 watts.
However
, the later
Possible spelling mistake found.
statrt
their downward trend earlier at 8 p. m.

Other
Possible spelling mistake found.
activites
fluctuate more than the mentioned ones. They
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
from 190
Possible spelling mistake found.
wats
at
Possible spelling mistake found.
mednight
followed by downward trend until 6 a. m.
Don't put a space before the full stop
.
Later, a significant rise
is happened
followed by another
Possible spelling mistake found.
flactuation
from 2 to 6 p. m. when they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
to go down again.
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IELTS academic The par chart compares the normal electrical consumption

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
223 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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