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The maps below show the changes that took place at a science and technology museum between 1996 and 2016.

The maps below show the changes that took place at a science and technology museum between 1996 and 2016. 2rg7j
The maps depict the alterations to the Science and Technology Museum in a period of time from 1996 to 2016. In summary, the Museum underwent a development in technology and some advanced in devices and facilities were installed in the areas. During two decades, some major change that was made for the entire areas of the museum. In 1996, the Writing desks which located in the top left corner was replaced by a block of Computers after 20 years. Furthermore, the Library set near the Print room was removed next to it because of the 3D cinema and digital technology room occurrence. Additionally, a completely new VR room was added in the right of the Library. Some unchanged places which was both the Steam and Diesel engine exhibitions and Reception while behind those exhibitions, restaurant took the place of Cafe. Moreover, in 2016, museum was equipped with a Solar wind area at the top right corner of the room. The Car park was still remained at the same location but getting smaller in size in order to divide the space into 2 pieces for Car and Bycicle park. To sum up, the museum underwent an expansion of its accommodation and recreational amenities during several years between 1996 and 2016.
The maps depict the alterations to the Science and Technology
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Museum
in a period of time from 1996 to 2016. In summary, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Museum
underwent a development in technology and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
advanced in devices and facilities
were installed
in the areas.

During two decades,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
major
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
that
was made
for the entire areas of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museum
. In 1996, the Writing desks which located in the top
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
left
corner
was replaced
by a block of Computers after 20 years.
Furthermore
, the Library set near the Print
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
room
was removed
next
to it
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of the 3D cinema and digital technology
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
room
occurrence.
Additionally
, a completely new VR
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
room
was
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
added
in the right of the Library.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
unchanged places which was both the Steam and Diesel engine exhibitions and Reception while behind those exhibitions, restaurant took the place of
'Cafe' is an imported foreign expression, which originally has a diacritic. Consider using "café"
Cafe
.
Moreover
, in 2016,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museum
was equipped
with a Solar wind area
The usual prepositions to use with a corner "in" not "on". Did you mean "in the top right corner"?
at the top right corner
of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
room
. The Car park was
still
remained at the same location
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
getting
A more concise phrase may lose no meaning and sound more powerful.
smaller in size
in order to divide the space into 2 pieces for Car and
Possible spelling mistake found.
Bycicle
park.

To sum up, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museum
underwent an expansion of its accommodation and recreational amenities during several years between 1996 and 2016.
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IELTS academic The maps below show the changes that took place at a science and technology museum between 1996 and 2016.

Academic
  American English
3 paragraphs
209 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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