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The map shows the changes of Grange park from 1920 to today.

The map shows the changes of Grange park from 1920 to today. dpEyp
The two maps show the main changes which have taken place in the park of Grage between the year 1920 and today. In general, it appeares that Grange park has become a much more modern park, with enterance underground car park and the other facilities. One interesting change is that in 1920 the glasshouse has disappeared, but a new water feature has built near the Enterance of the Eldon street. Another striking change is that the Rose garden and the Pond for water plants have been replaced to entertainment facilities, such as Cafe and the Play area of children in the north-east of the park. If we look at the park centre area in 1920, the Furnitue has been demolished, however the rose garden has been constructed and several seats have been built around the rose garden for convenience of people in the centre of the park. A final interesting development is that Amphitheatre for concerts have been replaced to the Stage for musicians in the east area of the Park.
The two maps
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show
the main
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
which have taken place in the
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park
of
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Grage
between the year 1920 and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
.
In general
, it
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appeares
that Grange
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park
has become a much more modern
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
park
, with
Possible spelling mistake found.
enterance
underground car
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park
and the other facilities. One interesting
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
is that in 1920 the glasshouse has disappeared,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
a new water feature has built near the
Possible spelling mistake found.
Enterance
of the Eldon street. Another striking
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
is that the Rose garden and the Pond for water plants have
been replaced
to entertainment facilities, such as
'Cafe' is an imported foreign expression, which originally has a diacritic. Consider using "café"
Cafe
and the Play area of children in the north-east of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
park
. If we look at the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
park
Possible spelling mistake. 'centre' is British English.
centre
area in 1920, the
Possible spelling mistake found.
Furnitue
has
been demolished
,
however
the rose garden has
been constructed
and several seats have
been built
around the rose garden for convenience of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
in the
Possible spelling mistake. 'centre' is British English.
centre
of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
park
. A final interesting development is that
Possible spelling mistake. 'Amphitheatre' is British English.
Amphitheatre
for concerts have
been replaced
to the Stage for musicians in the east area of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Park
.
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IELTS academic The map shows the changes of Grange park from 1920 to today.

Academic
  American English
1 paragraphs
171 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
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  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
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  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
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    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
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    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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