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The line graph represents the data related to variations in three alternative areas of crime in Manchester city centre between 2003 and 2012.

The line graph represents the data related to variations in three alternative areas of crime in Manchester city centre between 2003 and 2012. mjMO
The line graph represents the data related to variations in three alternative areas of crime in Manchester city centre between 2003 and 2012. Overall, the rate of burglary declined massively, while car theft showed an upward trend over the time. However, robbery remained relatively stable over the period. Looking into the details of graph, in the beginning, burglary cases was 7 times more (around 3400) than the robbery, and gradually declined to around 1000 in year 2008. After that, it rose to approximately 1400 in 2009 and remained stable till 2012. In contrast, the crime rate of car theft was around 2300 in 2003, which increased by a difference of about 300 at the end (with minor variations in between). However, robbery ratio remained stable at around 600 in 2012, experiencing minor fluctuations during the time line.
The line graph represents the data related to variations in three alternative areas of crime in Manchester city
Possible spelling mistake. 'centre' is British English.
centre
between 2003 and 2012.
Overall
, the rate of burglary declined
massively
, while car theft
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
showed
an upward trend over the time.
However
, robbery remained
relatively
stable over the period. Looking into the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
details
of graph, in the beginning, burglary cases was 7 times more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
(around
3400) than the robbery, and
gradually
declined to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
around
1000 in year 2008. After that, it rose to approximately 1400 in 2009 and remained stable till 2012.
In contrast
, the crime rate of car theft was
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
around
2300 in 2003, which increased by a difference of about 300 at the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
(with minor variations in between).
However
, robbery ratio remained stable at
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
around
600 in 2012, experiencing minor fluctuations during the time line.
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IELTS academic The line graph represents the data related to variations in three alternative areas of crime in Manchester city centre between 2003 and 2012.

Academic
  American English
1 paragraphs
137 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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