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The line graph provide number of overseas people travelled to UK for three different purposes between 1989 to 2009

The line graph provide number of overseas people travelled to UK for three different purposes between 1989 to 2009 mLMyq
The provided line graph expounds the information about plethora of foreign visitors who came United kingdom for business, holidays and meeting with friends and relatives from 1989 to 2009. To begin with, about 6. 5 million people travelled to UK for holidays in 1989. Followed by, this number rose rapidly and peaked at 9 millions in 1997. After that it fell dramatically and reached at 6. 5 millions in 2004. Interestingly, number of visitors again travelled to UK and number reached at 9 million in given last year. Probing further, trips for meeting with friends and relatives accounted 3. 5 millions in 1989which had been significantly escalated at 7 millions in 2009. After that slight reduces seen in meeting friends. Moreover, 5 millions individuals visit to UK for business in 1989 as well as it show fluctuated trend and rise to 8 millions in 2009 and slightly reduced in following year. Overall, it is clear from above graph that more people went to united kingdom for holidays.
The provided line graph expounds the information about plethora of foreign visitors who came
The proper noun "United Kingdom" needs to be capitalized.
United kingdom
for business, holidays and meeting with friends and relatives from 1989 to 2009. To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, about 6. 5
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
million
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
travelled to UK for holidays in 1989. Followed by, this number rose
rapidly
and peaked at 9
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
millions
in 1997. After that it fell
dramatically
and reached at 6. 5
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
millions
in 2004.
Interestingly
, number of visitors again travelled to UK and number reached at 9
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
million
in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
last year. Probing
further
, trips for meeting with friends and relatives accounted 3. 5
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
millions
in 1989which had been
significantly
escalated at 7
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
millions
in 2009.
“After” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
After
that slight
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduces
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
in meeting friends.
Moreover
, 5
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
millions
individuals visit to UK for business in 1989
as well
as it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
fluctuated trend and rise to 8
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
millions
in 2009 and
slightly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduced
in following year.
Overall
, it is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
from above graph that more
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
went to
The proper noun "United Kingdom" needs to be capitalized.
united kingdom
for holidays.
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IELTS academic The line graph provide number of overseas people travelled to UK for three different purposes between 1989 to 2009

Academic
  American English
1 paragraphs
167 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
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    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
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    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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