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The line graph below shows the consumption of 4 kinds of meat in a European from 1979 to 2004.

The line graph below shows the consumption of 4 kinds of meat in a European from 1979 to 2004. xmmW9
The given line graph provides information of people who ate 4 types of meat(chicken, beef, lamb, fish), over a twenty five-years period between 1979 and 2004 in European. Overall, the consumption of 3 kinds of meat decreased over the period in question, with only exception of chicken meat, which significantly went up by 2004. Looking at the details, we can see that the most consumed meat was chicken (140 grams per person per week), which considerably growed to 250 grams by 2004. What we can not say about other meat. For example, beer meat(220), this meat decreased to about 180 grams in then was a little outbreak and beer slightly increased from about 180 to 240, but then halved to about 120 in the end of the period. Almost the same with lamb meet(150grams), that gradually declined to about 70 grams in 2004. And last one fish meet(60 grams), this meet at the beginning of the period was less consumed and over all period was steadily, but slightly dropped to about 50 at the end of period.
The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
line graph provides information of
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people
who ate 4 types of meat(chicken, beef, lamb, fish), over a twenty five-years
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period
between 1979 and 2004 in European.

Overall
, the consumption of 3 kinds of
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meat
decreased over the
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period
in question, with
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only
The usual collocation for "exception" in this context is "to" not "of". Did you mean "exception to"?
exception of
chicken
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meat
, which
significantly
went up by 2004.

Looking at the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
details
, we can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
that the most consumed
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meat
was chicken (140
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grams
per person per week), which
considerably
Possible spelling mistake. Did you mean "grew", the past tense form of the verb 'grow'?
growed
to 250
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grams
by 2004. What we can not say about other
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meat
.
For example
, beer
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meat(220)
, this
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meat
decreased to about 180
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grams
in then was a
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little
outbreak and beer
slightly
increased from about 180 to 240,
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but
then halved to about 120 in the
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end
of the
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period
. Almost the same with lamb
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meet
(150grams), that
gradually
declined to about 70
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grams
in 2004.

And last one fish
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
(60
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grams)
, this
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
at the beginning of the
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period
was less consumed and over all
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period
was
steadily
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
slightly
dropped to about 50 at the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
period
.
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IELTS academic The line graph below shows the consumption of 4 kinds of meat in a European from 1979 to 2004.

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
177 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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