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the life cycle of a sea salmon

the life cycle of a sea salmon okxY9
This diagram provides a clear description of the life cycle of a sea salmon. Overall, there is a total of 7 natural developmental stages taken place, starting with laying eggs in the fresh water and finishing at becoming spawning salmon. To start with, female adult salmon lays eggs in freshwaters like rivers or lakes. Then, these eggs hatched into alevin in about 3 months. At this time, they feed off on the yolk sac for several weeks. Then, these alevins develop into fry at 5 to 10 weeks old and swim. After several months, the fries grow into parr, and then they develop finger markings. In the next stage, they become smolts from 1 to 3 years and will group and head out to sea. When spending 1 to 8 years at sea, they reach their maturity. Finally, spawning adult salmon start the journey back to freshwater for laying eggs and die within 2 weeks. And the life cycle starts again.
This diagram provides a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
description of the life cycle of a sea salmon.
Overall
, there is a total of 7 natural developmental stages taken place, starting with laying eggs in the fresh water and finishing at becoming spawning salmon.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
with, female adult salmon lays eggs in
Possible spelling mistake found.
freshwaters
like rivers or lakes. Then, these eggs hatched into
Possible spelling mistake found.
alevin
in about 3 months. At this time, they feed off on the yolk sac for several weeks. Then, these
Possible spelling mistake found.
alevins
develop into fry at 5 to 10 weeks
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
and swim. After several months, the fries grow into
Possible spelling mistake found.
parr
, and then they develop finger markings. In the
next
stage, they
Possible spelling mistake found.
become smolts
from 1 to 3 years and will group and head out to sea. When spending 1 to 8 years at sea, they reach their maturity.
Finally
, spawning adult salmon
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
the journey back to freshwater for laying eggs and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
die
within 2 weeks. And the life cycle
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
starts
again.
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IELTS academic the life cycle of a sea salmon

Academic
  American English
2 paragraphs
161 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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