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The graphs below show the enrolments of overseas students and local students in Australian universities over a ten year period. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The graphs below show the enrolments of overseas students and local students in Australian universities over a ten year period. 2BAo
This line graph explains the enrolments of overseas and local students in Australian universties. In 2001, totally overseas student were less compare to local students. Students from overseas who were commencing in 2001 were also comparatively less from local students. Overseas students percentage has been increasing constantly through the years but the number of local student has been fluctuating over the years. From 2003 to 2010, students from other countries tend to study in Australia has developed rapdily, in other words, roughly 30000 to 80000 students from abroad attended schooling in Australian universities. Similarly, from 2001 to 2005 the counting of local students has increased gradually but in the year of 2006, percentage of local students in Australian universities is constant, alternatively it is maintained from 2006 to 2010. Each graph refers the number of students which includes international students and local students attempted to study in Australian universities over ten years.
This line graph
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explains
the
Possible spelling mistake. 'enrolments' is British English.
enrolments
of
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overseas
and
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local
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students
in Australian
Possible spelling mistake found.
universties
. In 2001,
totally
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overseas
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student
were less compare to
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local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Students
from
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overseas
who were commencing in 2001 were
also
comparatively
less from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Overseas
Apostrophe might be missing. Did you mean "students'" or "student's"?
students
percentage has been increasing
constantly
through the years
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
the number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
has been fluctuating over the years. From 2003 to 2010,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
from other countries tend to study in Australia has developed
Possible spelling mistake found.
rapdily
,
in other words
, roughly 30000 to 80000
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
from abroad attended schooling in Australian universities.
Similarly
, from 2001 to 2005 the counting of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
has increased
gradually
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
of 2006, percentage of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
in Australian universities is constant,
alternatively
it
is maintained
from 2006 to 2010.

Each graph refers the number of
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students
which includes international
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
attempted to study in Australian universities over ten years.
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IELTS academic The graphs below show the enrolments of overseas students and local students in Australian universities over a ten year period.

Academic
  American English
2 paragraphs
152 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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