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The graphs below show the enrolments of overseas students and local students in Australian universities over a ten year period. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The graphs below show the enrolments of overseas students and local students in Australian universities over a ten year period. 0Ap59
The graph illustrates an amount of enrolments on Australian universities and a number overseas and local students, who decide to begin their studies study on these universities between 2001 and 2010. According to graph, it is easily visible that the number of students, who decide to enrol on Australian universities increases. In comparison with 2001 the number of overseas students in total in 2010 rose on around 60000 and this amount increases every year. Not only overseas students but also local students decide to apply for a place on Australian universities. Comparing to overseas students, the number of local students who are interested in studying in Australia is significantly bigger. In 2010 there were around 600000 local students, who decide to apply for place on university and around 200000 students, who decide to study there. Furthermore, from the graph we can conduct that the number of local students in total stays on the same level. That means that number of students who start studying in Australia every year is similar. In my opinion this is due to the fact that the offer of universities is limited and not everyone is allowed to receive a place on the university.
The graph illustrates an amount of
Possible spelling mistake. 'enrolments' is British English.
enrolments
on Australian
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
universities
and a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
overseas
and
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local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
decide
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
their studies study on these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
universities
between 2001 and 2010.

According to graph, it is
easily
visible that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
decide
to enrol on Australian
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
universities
increases.
In comparison
with 2001 the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
overseas
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
Adverb repetition. Please, verify.
in total in
2010 rose on around 60000 and this amount increases every year. Not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
overseas
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
decide
to apply for a place on Australian
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
universities
. Comparing to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
overseas
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
are interested
in studying in Australia is
The extreme adjective for big is "huge", "massive", "colossal", "gigantic", or "giant".
significantly bigger
. In 2010 there were around 600000
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
decide
to apply for place on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
and around 200000
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
decide
to study there.
Furthermore
, from the graph we can conduct that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
in total stays on the same level. That means that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
studying in Australia every year is similar. In my opinion
this is due to the fact that
the offer of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
universities
is limited
and not everyone is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
allowed
to receive a place on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
.
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IELTS academic The graphs below show the enrolments of overseas students and local students in Australian universities over a ten year period.

Academic
  American English
2 paragraphs
198 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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