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The graphs below show the enrolments of overseas students and local students in Australian universities over a ten year period. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The graphs below show the enrolments of overseas students and local students in Australian universities over a ten year period. 03d5
The above chart shows the flow of overseas and local students over 10 years of time. In this chart, red signifies the local students and blue signifies the overseas students. The X part of chart represents years whereas Y represents the number of students. As we can derive from the above chart, in the year 2001, 20000 local students applied whereas just about 10000 overseas students were enrolled in the universities. There was a significant increase in the local students enrollment of about 6000 to 10000 in the year 2002, whereas just about 1000 overseas students increased in enrollment which is much lower than it's counterpart. There was a sudden drastical increase in students in between the year 2003 and 2004. The number of local students roceketed upto around 78000 until the year of 2009 where as there was just a small bit of increase in the enrollment in the year between 2009 and 2010. Similarly, the number of overseas students didnt increase by much in the 10 years. There was an increase of almost 10000 after the year 2008. Nonetheless, the enrollment of the overseas students were rather small in comparison to the local srudents. Now, we can conclude that, local students were finding it more easy for the enrollment while overseas students had hard time enrolling into the universities. Just about 20000 number of students increased in the period of 10 years.
The above
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chart
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shows
the flow of
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overseas
and
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local
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students
over 10 years of time. In this
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chart
, red signifies the
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local
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students
and blue signifies the
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overseas
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students
. The X part of
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chart
represents years whereas Y represents the
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number
of students.

As we can derive from the above
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chart
, in the
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year
2001, 20000
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local
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students
applied whereas
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just
about 10000
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overseas
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students
were enrolled
in the universities. There was a significant
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increase
in the
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local
Apostrophe might be missing. Did you mean "students'" or "student's"?
students
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enrollment
of about 6000 to 10000 in the
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year
2002, whereas
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just
about 1000
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overseas
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students
increased in
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enrollment
which is much lower than it's counterpart. There was a sudden
Possible spelling mistake found.
drastical
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increase
in
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students
in between the
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year
2003 and 2004. The
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number
of
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local
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students
Possible spelling mistake found.
roceketed
Possible spelling mistake found.
upto
around 78000 until the
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year
of 2009
Did you mean "whereas"?
where as
there was
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just
a
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small
bit of
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increase
in the
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enrollment
in the
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year
between 2009 and 2010.
Similarly
, the
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number
of
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overseas
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students
Possible spelling mistake found
didnt
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increase
by much in the 10 years. There was an
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increase
of almost 10000 after the
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year
2008. Nonetheless, the
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enrollment
of the
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overseas
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students
were
rather
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small
in comparison
to the
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local
Possible spelling mistake found.
srudents
.

This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Now
, we can conclude that,
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local
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students
were finding it more easy for the
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enrollment
while
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overseas
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students
had
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hard
time enrolling into the universities.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Just
about 20000
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number
of
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students
increased in the period of 10 years.
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IELTS academic The graphs below show the enrolments of overseas students and local students in Australian universities over a ten year period.

Academic
  American English
3 paragraphs
234 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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