Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

The graphe below shows the consumption of fish and some different kinds of meat in a European country between 1979 and 2004. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. v.2

The graphe below shows the consumption of fish and some different kinds of meat in a European country between 1979 and 2004.
The line graph demonstrates the amount of fish and some various types of meat which had consumed in some European country during 40 years. From a simple recognition to the provided information, it is apparent chicken was the most kind of meat that a person used per week. While, minimum portion a person used to use belong to fish. In 1979, beef was the most popular kind of meat because it used to be eaten 220 grams per person in a week, although, chicken and lamp were eaten is a similar portion by approximately 150 grams by a person in the same time. Also, fish were just a negligible proportion of meals in a week by 50 grams in a week. it is considerable that in 2004, both beef and lamb amounts in people’s diet declined dramatically, beef usage fell to 110 grams in a week and lamb decreased to mere 60 grams per person in one week. Besides that, it is noticeable that chicken proportion rose particularly from 1989 to 2004.
The line graph demonstrates the amount of fish and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
various types of meat which had consumed in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
European country during 40 years.

From a simple recognition to the provided information, it is apparent chicken was
This adjective uses the short comparatives form.
the most kind
of meat that a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
per
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
week
.
“While” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
While
, minimum portion a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
belong to fish.

In 1979, beef was the most popular kind of meat
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to
be eaten
220
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
grams
per
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
in a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
week
, although, chicken and lamp
were eaten
is a similar portion by approximately 150
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
grams
by a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
in the same time.
Also
, fish were
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
a negligible proportion of meals in a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
week
by 50
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
grams
in a week.

This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
it
is considerable that in 2004, both beef and lamb amounts in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
’s diet declined
dramatically
, beef usage fell to 110
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
grams
in a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
week
and lamb decreased to mere 60
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
grams
per
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
in one
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
week
.
Besides
that, it is noticeable that chicken proportion rose
particularly
from 1989 to 2004.
3Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
15Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Mistakes

IELTS academic The graphe below shows the consumption of fish and some different kinds of meat in a European country between 1979 and 2004.

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
172 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Similar posts


Recent posts