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the graph shows the value of sales

the graph shows the value of sales ORkr7
The line graph illustrated the sales of price for four products over the period 2009. In general, from January to December, the sales value of product A and C increased, while product B directed reduced. During this time, the prices of these products were substantial. If taking commodity A, in the period from January to December, it has increased sharply. Look at other products that have changed, then take product C, which has also steadily increased and skyrocketed over the past year. At the beginning of the year, the cost of product C was more than ten thousand dollars, and by the end of the year that cost had increased to five hundred thousand dollars. The prices of both commodities fluctuate slightly in the middle of the year. On the contrary, it is easy to see that product B is significantly reduced. Despite the fact that the price of the product is highest in January, this number has been steadily decreasing over the course of twelve months. As a result, at the end of the year, the cost of the product reached almost the lowest.
The line graph illustrated the sales of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
price
for four
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
over the period 2009.
In general
, from January to December, the sales value of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
A and C
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
increased
, while
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
B directed
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduced
.

During this time, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
prices
of these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
were substantial. If taking commodity A, in the period from January to December, it has
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
increased
sharply
. Look at other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
that have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
, then take
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
C, which has
also
steadily
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
increased
and skyrocketed over the past
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
. At the beginning of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
, the cost of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
C was more than ten thousand dollars, and by the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
that cost had
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
increased
to five hundred thousand dollars. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
prices
of both commodities fluctuate
slightly
in the middle of the year.

On the contrary
, it is easy to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
B is
significantly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduced
. Despite the fact that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
price
of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
is highest in January, this number has been
steadily
decreasing over the course of twelve months.
As a result
, at the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
, the cost of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
reached almost the lowest.
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IELTS academic the graph shows the value of sales

Academic
  American English
3 paragraphs
185 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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