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The graph shows the teleworking rates by sex in the United Kingdom between 1997 and 2005 and the rates by occupation and location of workplace in 2005 v.2

The graph shows the teleworking rates by sex in the United Kingdom between 1997 and 2005 and the rates by occupation and location of workplace in 2005 v. 2
The graph illustrates the percentages of teleworkers in both sexes in the UK from 1997 to 2005, while the bar chart demonstrates the teleworking rates by professions and workplaces in 2005. Looking at the graph, in 1997, a mere 3% of women and a tiny minority of men (4%) were doing teleworking and these figures rose steadily and had reached to 6% and 12% respectively, by 2005. Moving to the bar chart, It can be clearly seen that managers and senior officials comprised 10% of teleworkers which 3% of them preferred to work in their own homes and the rest favored different places. It should be noted that there is a similar pattern for some who had professional occupations. Also many who had skilled trades constituted 18% of teleworkers which the overwhelming majority of them (17%) chose different places for working and only 1% of them worked in their personal homes. In conclusion, in this period of time people' s tendencies for teleworking were on the increase and in 2005 most teleworkers had skilled trades.
The graph illustrates the percentages of teleworkers in both sexes in the UK from 1997 to 2005, while the bar chart demonstrates the teleworking rates by professions and workplaces in 2005.

Looking at the graph, in 1997, a mere 3% of women and a tiny minority of
men
(4%) were
doing teleworking
and these figures rose
steadily
and had reached to 6% and 12%
respectively
, by 2005.

Moving to the bar chart, It can be
clearly
seen
that managers and senior officials comprised 10% of teleworkers which 3% of them preferred to work in their
own
homes and the rest favored
different
places. It should
be noted
that there is a similar pattern for
some
who had professional occupations.
Also
many
who had skilled trades constituted 18% of teleworkers which the overwhelming majority of them (17%) chose
different
places for working and
only
1% of them worked in their personal homes.

In conclusion
, in this period of time
people&
#039; s tendencies for teleworking were on the increase and in 2005 most teleworkers had skilled trades.
3Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Mistakes
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IELTS academic The graph shows the teleworking rates by sex in the United Kingdom between 1997 and 2005 and the rates by occupation and location of workplace in 2005 v. 2

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
175 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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