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The graph shows the percentage of 15 year olds with low literacy

The graph shows the percentage of 15 year olds with low literacy mWXgq
This graph provides information about the percentages of 15 year olds with low literacy levels in four countries in about a decay. These countries are Austria, Denmark, Ireland and sweden. With the exception of Denmark in all mentioned countries, an upward trend could be seen. Although, in 2000 Denmark had the highest rate in the poor literacy level of teenagers, it gained the fourth level in 2009. Conversely, in the other three countries the proportion of children with low literacy level increased between 2000 to 2009. In addition the percentages of children with weak literacy were between 12 to 17 percent among those countries while in 2009 the percentage of 15 year olds with literacy problems went up and were between 15 to 28 percent.
This graph provides information about the percentages of
It seems that hyphens are missing
15 year olds
with low
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literacy
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levels
in four
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countries
in about a decay. These
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countries
are Austria, Denmark, Ireland and
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sweden
.

Consider using "except" or "except for"
With the exception of
Denmark in all mentioned
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countries
, an upward trend could be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
. Although, in 2000 Denmark had the highest rate in the poor
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literacy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
level
of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
teenagers
, it gained the fourth
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level
in 2009.

Conversely
, in the other three
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countries
the proportion of children with low
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literacy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
level
increased
Use "between" + "and" not "to." Try this: "between 2000 and 2009".
between 2000 to 2009
.

In
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addition
the percentages of children with weak
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literacy
were
Use "between" + "and" not "to." Try this: "between 12 and 17".
between 12 to 17
percent among those
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countries
while in 2009 the percentage of
It seems that hyphens are missing
15 year olds
with
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literacy
problems went up and were
Use "between" + "and" not "to." Try this: "between 15 and 28".
between 15 to 28
percent.
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IELTS academic The graph shows the percentage of 15 year olds with low literacy

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
125 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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