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The graph shows the average amount of money women earned as a percentage of men’s earnings in the USA from 1975 to 2005

The graph shows the average amount of money women earned as a percentage of men’s earnings in the USA from 1975 to 2005 br3JY
The line graph given illustrates the difference in both genders’ income in America between 1975 and 2005 for 4 age groups. Overall, there was an increase in women’s earnings compared with men’s, during the period shown in the graph. It can be seen that the salary of women in 16 to 24 years old was the highest in the four age groups. It reached its peak in 1985 and slightly increased until 2005. The following group of age also had a growth in the percentage, from below 70 per cent to nearly 90 per cent in 2005. Besides that, the two other age groups still had low earnings in this period. They only earned over 40 per cent less than men did in 1975. In the group of 35 to 44 years old, there was a slight decrease in salary during 1995 to 2000 before it increased to over 70 per cent in 2005. In addition, for the oldest group, it had a small increase in five years from 1975, after that, their income had improve a lot until its peak in 2005 with more than 70 per cent compared to males’
The line graph
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
illustrates the difference in both genders’ income in America between 1975 and 2005 for 4
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
groups
.
Overall
, there was an increase in women’s earnings compared with
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
men
’s, during the period shown in the graph.

It can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
that the salary of women in 16 to 24 years
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
was the highest in the four
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
groups
. It reached its peak in 1985 and
slightly
increased until 2005. The following
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
group
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
also
had a growth in the percentage, from below 70 per cent to
nearly
90 per cent in 2005.

Besides
that, the two other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
groups
still
had low earnings in this period. They
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
earned over 40 per cent less than
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
men
did in 1975. In the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
group
of 35 to 44 years
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
, there was a slight decrease in salary during 1995 to 2000
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
it increased to over 70 per cent in 2005.
In addition
, for the oldest
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
group
, it had a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
increase in five years from 1975, after that, their income had
Possible agreement error -- use past participle here: "improved".
improve
a lot until its peak in 2005 with more than 70 per cent compared to males
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
’
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IELTS academic The graph shows the average amount of money women earned as a percentage of men’s earnings in the USA from 1975 to 2005

Academic
  American English
3 paragraphs
191 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
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    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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